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Califcyclone

Letters From Inanimate Objects, BB Haikus, Poetry and Vision Boards

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Thought we might expand this thread to all kinds of creative Big Brother outlets:

  • Letters From Inanimate Objects to Big Brother Houseguests
  • Big Brother Haikus
  • Poetry
  • and thanks to Ashley "Big Brother Dream Boards.

Dear Shane:

We want our necklace back.

Sincerely,

The 70's

Yo Yo Yo... JoJo & Jen:

Youz ain't no "Dick At Nite".

C'mon ya screen Ho's,

Step up your game or dump the show.

Peace Out,

Ted The Bear

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Dear Britney,

When are you going to come back and crack some more jokes?

Sincerely,

The diary room

Dear Boogie,

You remind me of a booger from my nose. I want it out immediately!

Sincerely,

the Big Brother house

Dear Ian,

You're the perfect person to play Carrot-Top in the up-coming movie about his life.

Sincerely,

the bathroom mirror

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Ian, Ian, Ian:

How can someone so smart be so dumb?

I'm watching you.

The HOH Spy Cam

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Ian,

You took my innocence away from me. Joe and I will never be the same.

Please don't touch me again.

Regards,

Joe's Cowboy Hat

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Dear wil,

Fabio called said not only does he want his hair back but he also says not to make it a mockery by putting it up into pigtails.

sincerly,

your hair

Dear Frank,

Use me

Sincerly,

A hair brush

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Whew, feels like forever since I've been on Mortys. You know it's Big Brother time when I pop out of lurkdom.

But anyway, here's my note:

Dear Ian,

Please get out, you give me the creeps.

Sincerely,

the House

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Willie:

Leave me out of your plans & schemes.

Yours (not so) Fondly,

Fruit Loops

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Dear Pork Rinds:

Big Brother is hosting a special food group support session in the HOH at 10am.

We will be talking about long term management of PTWD (Post Traumatic Willie Disorder)

Hugs & Serenity,

Fruit Loops

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Guest Corky812

To the producers from the dark baking pans: please replace me with Air Bake so Brittany will shut up!

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Dear Ash.....what .... dear ash....what ......dear ash ...what??? Did someone say something???

Huh?

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Guest Corky812

To Alison Grodner from the Big Brother House: please stop sending the same old people in here!!

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Dear America's Vote Committee:

Can you please ask America if they would want to see any one of us have a date with Joe's Soul Patch.

Respectfully,

All the razor's and the blender in the BB House

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Dear Frank,

Lil' Orphan Annie called, you really need to return me asap.

Thanks

His Hair

Dear Wil,

I am now thoroughly disgusted with your use. Please, the pony tail in the slant off the middle of the head, not to mention the braid across your forehead the other night. Really tired of how you treat me.

Regards,

His Hair

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Thought we might expand this Thread to other creative things like BB Haikus, Poetry and thanks to Ashley (Dream Boards).

Ashley's Dream Board - Week 3

Hello Dream Board you are looking extra tan this week.

  • I would like a man with eyes and ears and a mouth. He does not need to see or hear but must be able to eat. He can be tall and short and oh you know what I like...
  • Also, I would like to be put up on the block to experience humbleness but be surrounded by a forcefield of immunity that has unicorn guardians that repels all negative energy and changes any vote cast for me to Shannon Daugherty who did not tip me 3 months ago for that special Brazilian tan.

Mike Boogie's Week 3 Dream Board

  • I envision Shane continuing to be a mindless dolt totally diregarding that Frank and I were the one's that had him up for eviction last week and wanted him gone until he won the POV.
  • Oh and vision board if possible figure out a way I can steal back the $3K I so graciously "gave" to Ian in a way that keeps Ian's good will toward me but let's me be the greedy batard I really am.
  • I would also like for everyone in the Big Brother universe to forget that I rode Dr Will's coat tails and for all of humanity to think I am as good of a player as I think I am.
  • And while were at it I would like to bang Kara when I get out of here.

Willie Dream Board:

  • Get out of Jail Free Card I won in Monolopy with Russell and Brandon works is lieu of actual Bail Bondsman.
  • Britney and I are BFF's once the game is over.

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Dear Production,

Would you rig a comp so that Boogie has to wear one of those dead president rubber masks for the rest of his time in the house? Nixon would be awesome.

Thanks,

All the Shiny Surfaces

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Dear Joe,

Please use your "inside" voice. You're speaking in pitches only dogs can stand.

Signed,

the Diary Room

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Dear Danielle

Why must you continually mock me, why can't you just be happy with your own face, though I do see how that would be a difficult one to take. Please quit trying to look like me.

Signed,

The Pool Duck

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Dear Joe,

Although we've never met, most of those in your profession consider me a high priority. I suggest you get aquainted with me because the cameras are always rolling and they know what those dirty dirty hands have been up to.

Signed,

The Bathroom Soap

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Mike:

I feel so dirty...

the way you look at me,

the way you fondle me,

the way you think of me.

If only you would treat me with a little respect.

Your $10K prize

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Mike...

Please, Please, Please give me a rest.....

Your mouth

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Haiku

A summer breeze blows

Gently between Ashley's ears

Thanks for the refill!

Haiku Format

Typically contains nature or seasonal reference

5 syllables

7 syllables

5 syllables

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