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Dick - Week 11


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I can't say I actually LOVE Richard (can't bring myself to say Dick) but I won't mind if he wins. But then,

I can say the same thing about Daniele and Zack.

But not Jameka.

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eh... personally... i never met a cute dick... but thats just me.


but dick, he is ok. if my grandma would let him sit on her new red couch.. then he cant be that bad.. (my grandma would woop his butt if he got out of line)

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Dick's so stupid when he went to the tailor to get something hemmed he thought they said phlegm and spat on the clerk.

What's the difference between Dick and a llama. Llama's only spit when they're angry.

There once was a man named Dick,

His habits were gnarly and sick.

One night when he farted,

eyes watered and smarted,

and the walls burst in flames like a wick.

Did you hear Dick donated his organs to science? Yeah, the science wing needed the tar in his lungs to help pave their new parking lot.

Dick is so gross (how gross is he?)...he's so gross his bodily functions are registered with the EPA in case of an environmental spill.

You known, Dick should really stop smoking, not just because of the physical problems but he really needs to save his breath to blow up his dates.

You guys ever seen an asshole in plastic? Check out Dick's driver's license. (OK, that's the first one I didn't make up myself...it's an oldie but goodie!)

Dick's language is so foul he can make Eddie Murphy blush (think about it)

Dick is so washed up he makes Andy Dick seem relevant.

Hey, did you guys hear even from the grave John Holmes is pissed because he found out now the Big Brother house has the biggest Dick on earth? (if you don't know who John Holmes is, I forgive you for not getting the joke)

With all that being said, and to be fair, I will now list Dick's positive qualities, in no particular order.

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