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2014 Celebrity Big Brother UK (CBBUK) - Season 12


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Launch Night - Friday, January 3rd, 2014

Happy New Year, BBUK Fans, Big Brother is Back! That's right, and this year Big Brother has made a New Year's resolution to be the best and baddest ever!

Twelve celebrity housemates entered the Big Brother House. They came to play as individuals but quickly became attached to each other as they were handcuffed in pairs before walking through the front door. As the first pair to enter, Lee and Casey were given instructions to get to know their fellow housemates because at after all the housemates were in the house, they would have the power to unlock one set of handcuffs.

After Casey & Lee came Dappy and Liz, Jasmine and Sam, Jim and Linda, Lionel and Ollie, and Luisa and Evander (yes, Hollyfield). After deliberating 30 seconds in the DR (mostly about who would tell the happy pair, not realizing they were being shown downstairs to their fellow celebs in the living room), Casey and Lee chose to uncuff Dappy and Liz.

But there is a price to pay for being freed as Dappy and Liz are nominated as a pair for the first eviction. But they won't face the British public vote alone - by Monday, two other couples will join them.

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We are working to get the web page up with links. As I understand it, with BB and YouTube cracking down on videos violating copyrights, uploaders are planning to only keep episodes online for about 3 days to avoid detection. For right now, check out http://www.bbcouchpotatoes.com/ and follow/friend @mortystv on Twitter or Morty Port on Facebook for updates!


Who is catching up himself...

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Day 2 - Let The Games Begin!

On Day 2, the celebs struggle to adjust to their new situation. Big Brother calls the housemates to the living room where they are to play Building Blocks of Celebrity, a game that would not only give the winning pair the key to their handcuffs, but immunity from the next eviction. Taking it in turns, the pairs had to choose a block which applies to one or both of them and place it onto their tower, before sharing a relevant story to the group. As all pairs finished with the same sized towers, they voted for who they thought deserved immunity the most. After hearing all the personal stories, the housemates choose Jim & Linda to be uncuffed and immune from the next eviction.

That night, the remaining four pairs are called to the DR to try and earn a chance to free themselves and earn immunity from the next eviction by predicting their partner's answers to three questions. Jasmine & Sam were the only pair to answer all three questions correctly, freeing themselves and earning immunity at the next eviction. After a conversation to Luisa in which he expressed his personal religious views on homosexuality, Evander was given a warning for offensive language that might offend viewers.

On Day 3, the remaining at-risk housemates, Casey & Lee, Evander & Luisa and Lionel & Ollie, were given a final chance to win immunity for themselves, finalizing the three pairs up for eviction. Each pair had to untie themselves to reach a key tied to a knotted rope. Lionel and Ollie untied themselves in the fastest time and won immunity. After the task, all three pairs had their handcuffs removed.

On Day 4, the housemates found a UFO landed in the garden. It's their first shopping task in which the housemates must complete a series of tasks set up by aliens. No longer paired, Liz and Lee tested their pain limits. Then Jasmine & Luisa tried to identify which housemates were referenced by viewers' tweets, and Jim going face to face with an alien over a disgusting meal.

Before the day was done, Dappy was given a warning by BB for telling Jasmine that gay people were "bent."

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Day Five - Live Eviction! Not!

The CBBUK Season is only 5 days old and already Big Brother is already making the celebrities confess their deepest secrets, subject themselves to alien testing and face a fake live double eviction. What have you accomplished this week? Either Casey & Lee, Dappy & Liz or Evander & Luisa will experience what they think is the judgment of the British voting public, but after leaving the house, they will be sent to the CBBUK Bolt Hole where they will live in secret until Friday, when they will return to the House and have to make a big decision.

The housemates entered the house handcuffed in pairs, and had to compete in a series of tasks to free themselves and avoid nomination. But once the cuffs were off, the games were on as Lee and Casey redefined cuddling bits, Dappy proved wrong the idioms of small feet and hands, and Lionel realized he doesn't understand kids these days.

When last we saw the housemates, Jasmine & Lee were keeping Jim out of the bathroom on the alien space ship doing things we don't know but the housemates had fun discussing. It took less than a week for Linda to become tired of Jim, for Evander and Dappy to both be called onto the BB carpet for inappropriate comments, Liz to be misunderstood and Ollie to break out in song. Evander successfully lists off the names and ages of all 11 children (all whose names begin with an E). Lee and Casey try to spend the day apart so he doesn't come across as a player, but succeed only in driving the gossip underground.

The aliens kidnap Jasmine, Lee and Liz and BB sends Dappy to covertly enter the alien ship and smash their egg pods. He chooses Evander to help him in the task. Me and you have to go into the UFO and smash some stuff, he tells Real Deal Hollyfield. OK, Evander says. They secret up to the tree house, change into some safety gear and then storm the spacecraft, busting the overhead alien eggs, releasing alien yoke, then answering three questions to unlock their fellow Celeb housemates. Wrong answers would result in a shock to the rear of the imprisoned. They get the final answer just in the nick of time to shut down the alien mainframe, release the prisoners and win a luxury shopping budget for food.

The thrill of winning a luxury shopping budget gives way to the frustration of actually creating the shopping list. Tempers flare and egos are bruised. Lee jokes they need to add condoms to the list. The younger housemates discuss what they can cook with the food they are about to receive while Jim & Lionel discuss their next potential roles. Lee and Jasmine crawl under the covers for a private conversation but BB tells them to put on their microphones. Casey cries to Linda as Lee and Jasmine secret to the bathroom. Jasmine tells him that he led Casey on as Linda tells Casey she's lucky to have escaped Lee.

Jim hears Casey's upset and assume he did something wrong. He reveals to Ollie that Lee and Jasmine were locked in the toilet last night. Lee doesn't understand how how he's treated Casey badly; he thinks he's been nice to her. He's told Casey's being oversensitive. The crowd in the bathroom grows as Casey goes to the DR for a mucked off cry with BB. Don't kiss her one day and then Jasmine the next day, she says. Late night, Casey and Lee sit down for a quiet chat. Lee says he doesn't want a relationship in the house with either her or Jasmine but thinks both girls are amazing. Casey apologizes for overreacting and Lee says he understands why she was upset and says he's sorry for upsetting her. They hug but there's no cuddling bits involved.

The younger housemates chat in the garden. With Jasmine in his arms, Lee confesses that he's experimented with the same gender. Jasmine says she had a year long relationship with a Costa Rican girl in Miami. Ollie says he's the first to ever come out as a bisexual on Reality TV but everyone thinks he's just gay. Jasmine says let's all just have an orgy when they get out of the house. Bedtime arrives and with no doghouse, Lee has no place to sleep. The last thing he wants is for Casey to see him wake up in the morning next to Jasmine, so he chooses to exchange places with Ollie and sleep on the floor.

It's time to talk to the house to reveal the first Celebrity pair that is safe tonight. The housemates can hear the fans in the audience shouting who they want voted out. The first celebrity pair of housemates with the most votes to save and safe from eviction is... Evander & Luisa!

Either Casey & Lee or Dappy & Liz will be the first Celebrity pair to leave the BB house but they don't know it's not an eviction and that one of the pairs will head to the Big Brother Bolt Hole. The viewers have spoken, their fate is sealed. The first pair of Celebrity housemates with the least votes to save and the first to be evicted is... Casey & Lee!

Dappy gives a tearful Lee a long hug as the the fake-evicted pair walk up the long stairs to the front door after extensive promptings by BB. The countdown begins, the door slides open and Casey & Lee face the cold, rainy night and a mixture of cheers and boos. They descend the steps into the outdoor stage, still under the impression they've been evicted. Emma tells them to expect the unexpected and reveals the public hasn't been voting to evict, they are still housemates, and they are heading back into the house in the Bolt Hole on a secret mission. Casey says she just got rid of him. I feel the same way, babe, Lee says, not helping his cause. Good luck, Emma says, you're going to need it!

Casey and Lee are relieved to find double beds in the Bolt Hole as Lee stresses over how he is being perceived. Over nervous laughter, they hug over not being evicted. Casey reveals she has no underwear on with her extremely tight-fitting dress. The monitor comes on and they see their fellow housemates, so while stuffing chocolate dipped strawberries into their mouths, they don their headphones to listen in. In the Big Brother house, someone is ALWAYS listening.

Coming Up...

The first nominations are taking place as soon as the live show signs off, the remaining housemates reeling over their first loss of the season. The great British voting public will have only 24 to decide the first celebrity pair to be evicted - for real! Plus, Casey and Lee are not only watching and listening to their fellow celebrities in real time, BB is going to have to let them mess with the other housemates, right? BB's just gotta!

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and check out our full coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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Day Six - Kiss The Girls And Make Them Cry

It's the day of last night's eviction and Jasmine wakes up Lee off the floor with a snuggle and a snog. While Dappy takes a nap that afternoon, Lionel and Jim choreograph a new routine. In the DR, Lee tells BB in the DR that he doesn't think he's being perceived too well after what Casey did, blaming her for not keeping their situation under the table and instead making him look stupid and insensitive. He says it was a stupid move on her part because they are nominated and facing eviction as a pair.

The housemates are dressed up and ready for the live eviction, listening to the crowd noise in the backyard. Lee is oblivious that Casey and Jasmine are talking right in front of him, comparing stories and realizing Lee has been "affectionate" with both of them. As they assemble in the living room, Lee sandwiched between Casey and Jasmine, the girls tell him they know he's kissed both of them and Lee has to go to the kitchen to get away. He doesn't understand why the girls are taking things so seriously, he's tried to play it down but they keep bringing it up.

The girls decide Lee must be a player outside of the house. Over in the kitchen, Dappy finds Lee crying over the counter. He tells Lee to confront the girls for making him miserable. It's just so stressful, Lee says. He returns to the living room couch and can hear the crowd outside chanting Get Lee Out! The fake eviction of Lee and Casey takes place and Lee says this is going to be horrible as he sands before the front door. Inside the house, the Celebs decide Casey was a victim of the situation.

In the Bolt Hole, Casey announces it's done. Lee says everyone hates me. In the house, the punishing of Lee continues, led by Jasmine, with no defenders. Lee and Casey are listening to the house as Lee defends himself that he wasn't telling both of the same things. Lee says he's just a flirt, it was just a bit of fun. Jasmine & Luisa move into Lee and Casey's bed, worried about bodily fluids as Casey chastises Lee for holding hands and blowing kisses to Jasmine overnight. Casey says he disregarded her feelings. Lee says he did try not rubbing it in her face but he really does like her. All he told Casey was he liked her, she misunderstood what he meant and is acting like a 12 year old.

Linda decides that Lee is the reason Casey voted out. Lee goes to the DR for relationship advice, not understanding why he's a bad person because Jasmine gives him the butterflies. He begins crying that he could see this coming like a train wreck but couldn't stop it.

In the house, BB announces that nominations are about to begin. Evander says he just got out of that thing and y'all are going to put him back in! Dappy is upset Luisa said he sleeps all day and confronts her over the accusation. She's been in four arguments so far and he doesn't want to get into another one. She speaks too quickly, doesn't hold her tongue. Luisa says you don't sit or speak with us and she's not afraid to speak out. He says it was like a punch to his face. She apologizes. Cool, he says. Jasmine commiserates, there isn't a lot to do in the house but sleep, but that Luisa didn't mean to offend him.

One by one, the housemates are called to the DR to make nominations, unaware they are being watched by Casey and Lee. Ollie nominates Liz for being shy and Evander for not offering to cook or clean or anything in the house. Evander nominates Jasmine for twisting things between Lee and Casey, stirring stuff up. Lee says she hasn't done nothing. His second nomination is Ollie because the girls will pick Ollie over him. Linda nominates Jim for his snide remarks and Liz because she's difficult to get to know. In the house, Liz reveals that her mother was very protective and that's the reason she's a bit closed.

Sam nominates Luisa for laughing at Casey for the problems with Lee. Her second nomination is for Jim for upsetting Linda. Dappy nominates Luisa for arguing the most and butting into arguments. Lee tells Casey she's argued with a few people. Dappy's second nomination is Liz for saying she didn't mind if she went home while handcuffed to Dappy. Ollie nominates Jasmine for the screaming and getting drunk and butting in on conversations. His second nomination is Jim (Lee and Casey are shocked) for taking over in the house, he loves to be in charge.

Luisa nominates Dappy for being boring, sleeping all day and not integrating with the group, just keeping his mouth shut and hoping his fans will like him and vote for him to stay. Her second nomination is Jim because he says he doesn't want to be there. Liz nominates Luisa for taking too long to make the food list and wouldn't let her get her coffee. Her second nomination is Evander because his beliefs with animal rights conflict with hers, animals have souls and deserve respect. Casey and Lee agree with her love of animals.

Jim doesn't like Linda and nominates her, she's an angry and dangerous woman. His second nomination is Liz because he feels he needs to wait on her and be nice to her, she's a fish out of water, he's doing it for the peace in the world. Jasmine nominates Jim because she feels he's attacked her, and Liz because she doesn't engage in conversation, doesn't bring personality to the table. Casey says she's beautiful but a free spirit.

BB gathers the housemates in the living room to announce the nominations: Liz, Jasmine, Evander, Jim and Luisa. Half the remaining housemates will face the British public on Friday. Casey and Lee realize they dodged the nomination bullet. Casey tells BB in the DR that it's hard being alone with Lee in the Bolt Hole because she still likes him though he likes Jasmine. It's funny what being chained to someone will do to you, she says.

Jasmine and Luisa are on the video screen and Casey tells Lee to stop watching her. Lee says the difference between them is that Luisa just doesn't give a F*ck. The two girls talk about Lee and Casey, deciding Casey is most depressed. Lee is depressed that they think he's a wanker. Casey tells him to just enjoy himself.

Coming Up...

Five Celebrities face a double extinction in the Big Brother house, the three housemates with the most votes to save will be safe, the other two facing a twist which will be revealed during Friday's live eviction show. Plus, after 2 days in the Bolt House, Lee and Casey will shock their fellow housemates when they return to the main house.

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and check out our full coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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Day Seven - Out of the Bolt Hole and Into the Frying Pan

Tonight, Jim, Liz, Luisa, Evander and Jasmine all face eviction. Who goes? Casey & Lee decide!

The British voting public are voting to save three of the five nominees, who don't know that Casey and Lee were not really evicted Wednesday, then Casey and Lee will be given the responsibility of naming which of the remaining two nominees will be evicted.

It's the morning of Day 7 in the Bolt Hole as Casey tries to wake Lee up. Dappy feels sorry for them waking up as evictees. Jasmine seeks comfort stroking Ollie's hair. Casey teases Lee about crying over Jasmine. I was pretty emotional, Lee admits. In the DR, Liz says that emotional relationships go over her head, she's never been a cool girl. Lionel and Sam wonder what Casey and Lee are doing - probably interviews and press. He's not a teenager, Lionel says, he's 30, he knew what he was doing. Lee tells Casey the biggest lesson he's learned is to not do reality TV shows.

Lee tells BB that he feels better today and after a good night's sleep has decided he didn't do anything wrong. Love is beautiful and he just wants to be loved, so when someone shows him attention, he just grabs onto it because it's something that's just been missed.

BB put Dappy in a nappy after he broke the rules discussion nominations. Jasmine would have preferred Dappy had left instead of Lee and Casey. Lee tells Casey a story of when he was younger, how he got 5 girls numbers in a strip club, had sex with each of them on different nights of the week, then they compared notes on Saturday and he was banned from the club after that.

The Celebrities gather in the garden for Slime Watch. The housemates must guess who fans selected in a series of questions. If they guess wrong, the person gets gunged. But it's really Lee and Casey playing the role of fans. The first question is who is most aware of the camera, Ollie or Jasmine. Jasmine gets gunged. The most rude, Lee and Casey decide, is Jim & Luisa and Luisa gets slimed. To have some fun, Lee and Casey chooses Dappy and Ollie were the most fake housemates and designate Dappy to be gunged. Ollie is upset and Lee and Casey are entertained.

Dappy is unhappy in the DR, says he stands for being raw, down to earth, genuine, a giver, he'd be rich if he weren't such a giver, wants to confront those who called him fake. Lee & Casey work on how they are going to defend themselves and rationalize their decisions when they return to the house. Casey tells Lee to stick with her, Jim and Sam. Lee thinks Jasmine will stay clear of him now. They cuddle.

Casey thinks the public will see Jasmine as the one who came between them but Lee thinks she's not a bad girl. In the DR, Jasmine says the house is more boring without Lee and Casey, but she doesn't know who to believe now. In the living room, Liz says she doesn't know why people get upset at the horse when they fall off. Evander says he didn't know his horse was pregnant when she threw him off so he hit her. You hit a horse, Liz asks? Yeah, Evander says. Jim tries to tell a story about kitting your child but is interrupted and walks away in a huff.

Ollie tells Luisa he has a secret crush on Sam, but he hasn't told her. Watching from the Bolt Hole, Casey is shocked. Luisa tells Ollie to not do anything about it until after the show. Lee is back crying in the DR, dealing with his emotions for Casey and Jasmine, the audience chanting, "Get Lee Out," and having to return to the house on Friday and explain himself. The housemates are locked in the house while Lee and Casey get some fresh air and a fag in the garden while discussing what it will be like returning to the house.

Back in the Holt Hole, Lee speculates that it will be a double eviction. They return to cuddling. In the living room, Jim says that Dappy said if he sat with Jim he wouldn't be liked. Dappy says he didn't say that. Why would you say that, Linda asks Jim. To pi$$ you off, my dear, he says. Can't we all just get along, Evander asks? Luisa wonders if Jim and Linda had a prior sexual relationship but Jim says he'd rather put his genitals in a fryer. Jasmine and Luisa in bed discuss what kind of sex acts might have taken place between Lee and Casey.

It's time to talk to the house. The first housemate with the most votes to save and safe from eviction is... Jim!

The second person to be saved is... Jasmine!

Evander, Liz and Luisa remain nominated. The viewers have spoken, their fates are sealed. The third housemate to be saved is... Liz!

No, she says, let me out! That leaves Evander and Luisa to face the public vote. Or so they think.

It's time to drop the Bolt Hole Bombshell. For the last 24 hours, the British public has been voting to save. However, the final decision on who is evicted and who is safe does not rest with the public. It rests in the hands of 2 of your fellow housemates.

A video begins playing. You thought they had been evicted... BB reveals the fake eviction and get clips of Casey & Lee talking in the Bolt Hole as they watch the housemates and play with them in the grunge task. Then Lee and Casey are in the DR as they realize that BB will make them decide who to evict. That's out of order, Lee says. Lee says Evander because Luisa is his friend. The audience boos and Lee hears them. Casey decides to agree and they name Evander as the one to be evicted. Evander shows no emotion as he watches them discuss being close to Luisa and not knowing Evander well.

BB sends them back into the house where Evander is already saying his goodbyes. Dappy does not seem to be happy to see them. BB makes it official that Evander has been evicted and is told to leave the CBB House. He first tries the door to the DR then realizes he's going out the front door. He exits to cheers as he walks don the steps to pose for the paparazzi. He says he's not mad but seems ready to put the experience behind him. His vote is for Dappy to win.

Coming Up...

Evander's been Heavyweight Champion of the World 5 times, but Lee and Casey delivered the TKO punch, evicting him from the Celebrity Big Brother house. The first celebrity has been set free, but there are 11 more to go, and with Casey and Lee back in house, is an explosion far behind? And who will be evicted next, live next Wednesday?

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and check out our full coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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Day Eight - A Right To-Do

It's the morning of the first real live eviction, and while Lee & Casey have been ensconced in the Bolt Hole for the last 36 hours, the housemates think they have returned to the real world. Their morning conversation is about sex, love and returning to the house. Jim cleans up the kitchen and Linda gossips that he's like a different man. By the afternoon, Lee is going stir crazy in the Bolt Hole, watching the main house. BB calls him to the DR and he gives Casey a kiss goodbye. He tells BB it is so hard sitting next to Casey and watching Jasmine on the screen and nothing to do. BB lets him blow off some anger.

Luisa is also frustrated that Jim and the other guys are so messy in the kitchen. They like to cook but not to clean up, Liz says. Dappy digs himself in a unfaithful hole, saying a man who sleeps with 5 women is a pig but a woman who sleeps with 5 men is a ho. Casey is shocked when Evander says there's no such thing as equal between men and women. Dappy and Evander leaves and Luisa and Jasmine fill in Ollie on Evander's views on women. Jasmine says he's so unintelligent. Dappy returns, happy that the girls' ire is focused on Evander, but he digs his own hole deeper saying women who sleep around are slugs. That makes him a pig, Jasmine says and he agrees he'd rather be a pig than a slug. Luisa says group sex is OK though.

Luisa continues to gripe about the state of the kitchen with the two chauvinists in the house. Dappy overhears her and asks her how many men she's slept with in one night. Previously she had told Jasmine in secret and Dappy knows she has a secret and begins needling her for it. She belittles him as a man with no intellect. Jim walks in from the garden bewildered. Dappy says he respects his baby mamma. Luisa says he belittles women and she's extremely offended at how he's embarrassing himself. He says she's had no struggles in life, sleeping with 5 men in one night is not right. Lee tells Casey he would never talk to a woman like that. Luisa refuses to back down, says Dappy has no argument.

Jim invites Dappy outside for a cigarette so he can shout at him. Luisa continues to make her point among the girls in the kitchen while Evander, Dappy and Jim reflect the role of women. My mamma told me there are some things a woman can't do. Lee and Casey get frisky in the Bolt Hole. In the DR, Luisa tells BB that you can have all the money in the world, referring to Dappy, but you can't buy class. In the garden, Jasmine tries to calm Dappy down but Dappy just gets more riled up that Luisa said his mother would be ashamed of him. Will Luisa ever tell her daughter how many men she slept with?

Luisa returns to the house and Dappy jumps right on her, following her into the bedroom verbally attacking her. She asks him to stop, saying she can't argue with someone with such a low IQ. I got an A+ in English and a B in Math and Drama , he counters, what'd you get? Half an hour later, Dappy is still going after Luisa for talking about his mom. Lee and Casey rush to put the headphones on to listen in. Luisa accuses him of following his agent's advice to keep his mouth shut. Dappy calls her two-faced, saying one thing to his face and another behind his back. She calls him a little boy pretending to be a gangster.

Jim tries to escort Dappy upstairs to the diary room as he calls Luisa loose, her daughter should be embarrassed. In the DR, Dappy says he's sorry Luisa has no self-respect and someday his daughter is come to her and say but mommy, it was OK for you to have sex with 10 people in one night. She can't be that intelligent or she would have had better success. I wonder how many STDs she's had in her life, all I've ever had is one urinary infection. Down in the living room, Jim says it takes 2 hands to clap and you both just need to calm down. She runs out. Linda and Jim begin to fake fight over Luisa and Dappy's fight, bringing a bit of a laugh to the other housemates.

It's eviction time and Jim, Jasmine and Liz have been saved. It's down to Evander and Luisa and the housemates learn that the final decision on who is evicted rests in the hands of two of their fellow housemates. They see Lee and Casey in the DR on the video screen. They pick Evander to be evicted because Luisa is their friend. They return excitedly into the house while Evander quietly says goodbye to Jim and Dappy. He didn't even look back, Lionel says. Jasmine gives Lee a big hug and Dappy tells Lee he's so happy to see him back. He offers Dappy support. Casey tells how the audience cheered her and booed Lee. Casey tells Luisa says the funny part is Jasmine thinks she has Lee back but Lee doesn't want to have anything to do with her.

Jasmine is worried about what Lee and Casey saw and heard in the Bolt Hole. Lee says Casey had a problem with him looking at her. He tells her how he was crying like a little boy in the DR. Lee hugs both his girls, says he's apologized to both of them and now they can have a giggle. Luisa tells Casey and Lee that it's good to have the young ones back, everyone else is so old in the house. Lionel laughs uncomfortably. In the DR, Dappy says his buddy Evander is gone, he only cries for the people he loves. BB says he prefers to see a happy Dappy.

Luisa worries that the audience was chanting Get Luisa Out and wonders how it's going to affect her outside the house. Lionel says be honest - you want to old ones out, you meant it. Luisa says I said it but I didn't mean it. Jim asks haven't you had enough arguments for today? I just want to defend myself! Go ahead and have your argument, he says, walking away. Luisa breaks down into tears and goes into the toilet, crying about how everyone's attacking her.

It's just before midnight and Jim confesses to Luisa in bed that he's really a male chauvinist pig, and she's a unique woman and he doesn't understand her but doesn't like to see her upset. Out in the kitchen, Lionel says what Luisa said upset him terribly. Dappy says she's argued with everyone in the house. Linda says you were both out of order. Dappy starts arguing with Linda and Linda says she's sticking up for all women. Linda tells Lionel that Luisa was just joking but Lionel says he thinks she meant it.

Most of the housemates are in bed, but Dappy apologizes to Luisa and they hug it out in front of Lionel and Linda. That's made my night, he says, I'm going to bed with happiness. He gives Luisa a kiss on the head and goes to bed. Lee and Jasmine find some quiet time to grab a cigarette. Lee says Casey is still sensitive so he's trying to not be over around her. He tells Jasmine that they only cuddled in the Bolt House but she doesn't give him the same feeling Jasmine does. He apologizes again, says he has really deep feelings for her and doesn't care what anyone else thinks. He can't wait to get out of here. It's a pretty big head f*ck, Jasmine says. Tell me about it, Lee says.

Coming Up...

Are you Team Dappy or Team Luisa? Have Dapper, Luisa, Lee, Casey, Linda, Lionel and Jim all made up? Or is this just the weekend calm before the second week storm? And how will the mother of all arguments affect nominations and Wednesday's live eviction?

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and check out our full coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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Day Nine - Celebs Gone Wild!

It's the morning of Day 9 and Lee and Casey wake up back in the house having evicted Evander. The previous day's fights are still on the housemates minds. Luisa decides she wants to sit on the sofa and not speak to anyone all day, like Sam & Ollie. She hates being politically correct but maybe it's best to shut up and be sweet. Lee tells Lionel he'd love to get married and settle down but won't settle. Lionel said he didn't want to settle down until he made it. Casey tells Linda it was nice to work things out with Lee in the Bolt Hole, they're just friends. In the DR, Jasmine is wary of Casey and thinks Jim is a completely different person by day than by night. Dappy tries to show Lionel some moves and Lee takes a shower, telling Jasmine the only place he had a wank was the toilet, not a shower. Casey touches base with Jim, who tells her she should have just shagged Lee and gotten it out of her system. He can wait, Casey says. Jim says everyone fancies you, even the Dali Lama would fancy you.

BB calls Sam to the DR for a secret mission, to take one housemate to the lodge and admit having feelings for them. She chooses Ollie who had previously spilled to Jasmine that he has feelings for Sam. Sam confesses to him in the tree house that she fancies him but he doesn't believe her, that she would have said it like that. But he seems happy to have heard it. BB now tells Sam to lose her temper with a housemate, and she chooses Jasmine and accuses her of saying things about her behind her back. Lionel tries to make peace but quickly retreats. Sam runs to the DR and Jasmine and Luisa decide Casey is trying to turn them against Sam. Luisa says Casey is trying to turn them against Sam and Casey says what, I've not said anything and you shouldn't accuse me of anything when you don't know what's been said because I haven't said anything.

BB gives Sam presents to bring down to her housemates for completing the task and Jasmine is apologetic but Luisa doesn't say anything. Sam runs to Ollie to apologize for making him uncomfortable but says she does fancy him. Lionel and Jim talk about living with young people with such youthful energy. Sam distributes family photos from BB for all the housemates. Dappy apologizes to Luisa for everything and Jasmine continues to apologize profusely for accusing Casey of talking behind their backs. She tells Luisa and Dapper how confused Ollie was when Sam confessed her feelings as part of the task. In the DR, Ollie says he knew it was a task but he has a slightly inappropriate crush now, ridiculous in every way, he's making a fool out of himself. Maybe he'll flirt outrageously with Casey, have some wine and chocolate and see what happens next.

BB provides the housemates with two themed rooms, one is a kids playroom with a U certificate (Jim, Dappy, Linda, Liz and Casey) , the other a strip club with an 18 certificate (Lee, Jasmine, Ollie, Luisa, Lionel and Sam). In the U room, they housemates meet Mr. Monkey who temps them to play with his balls, singing If You're Happy And You Know It. The 18 related task is heavy metal motion with the housemates dressed in leather and playing with whips and their tongues. Mr. Monkey brings in a custard pie and lands it in Casey's face. In the other room, it's male and female pole dancing as the other housemates place bills in their outfits. In the U room, the housemates struggle to keep it clean and kiddie but can't help suggest alternative meanings to common words. Lee takes to the strip poll, drops his briefs to show his crack, humps the pole and Jasmine expresses her desire for his stiffie. Mr. Monkey brings 2 more custard pies into the U room, one for each of Casey's cheeks. Waive goodbye to Mr. Monkey!

Luisa gives Lionel personal exposure to her sweet cheeks and Lee admits he's got a boner. In the U room, it's time for Monkey Says. Monkey says to laugh, jump up and down, and act like a frog. Jim's frog is apparently French. Back in the 18 room, the final task is to tell ghost stories and Ollie tells a story about Dappy in the pitch black with a flash light on his face, with effects by BB. After 90 minutes BB gathers the housemates, who are just seeing each other in their outfits for the first time., and announces they both win their reward - food, drink and music tonight for all housemates to enjoy.

In the DR, Lionel says he's never been in a place like that before but Jasmine and Luisa seemed right at home. In the LR, the housemates discuss Lionel's reaction to being in the strip club. Jim tries to explain that Lionel wasn't annoyed at the girls but that he's used to directing and not participating. Jasmine tells Lee that Jim is saying Lionel is blaming the girls for dragging him into that. Lionel says I was just praying to myself, please don't get a boner.

Jim boosts Lionel's spirits with some Doctor, Doctor jokes, while Casey announces inside that it's unfair to blame Jasmine and Luisa for being too provocative. Jim tells Lionel about Jasmine's comments about what Jim said Lionel was thinking. Lionel says it was disgusting. Lionel wants to say something to Jasmine but Jim warns he'll upset Lee. There are a few getting on my nerves now, Jim says. In the bedroom, he complains about all the noise. The kids head outside, talking about how Jim is so grumpy and Lionel decides to retire. Come on Jim, you grumpy bast*rd, Jasmine calls, you grumpy old pr*ck! What, is that mean? Jim tells Linda what Jasmine said. Why, Linda asks? I must have had a drink, he says. Lionel says he's going to bed and then BB pumps in pop music for their reward party. Jim heads to the garden. Everyone but Liz is inside dancing, Lionel on the sofa in the living room and Jim on the chair under the tree house.

As they go to bed, Jasmine and Luisa sneak a can of beer under the covers but can't be quiet. Jim gets up and silently heads out of the bedroom to the garden. The girls realize Jim is gone and Jasmine gets up to go find him to ask if he's OK. She asks him not to be mad at them because the lights were still on. He says he couldn't sleep while they were up and she says she couldn't sleep with his snoring. Jim gets up and walks away, saying I know when I've been beat. What an a$$hole, Jasmine says, I really don't understand him, he must be the most miserable pr*ck I've ever met in my life. Alone in the LR, Jim says just wind up, circling his hand like a crank.

Coming Up...

It's nominations time again and who knows what Big Brother has in store for the celebrity housemates this time. Will the house divide by age? Will fights and arguments force housemates to choose sides? Will Celebs take the opportunity to get revenge or exercise grievances? In the CBB House, anything is possible - and probable!

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Day Ten - Big Brother's Beastly Kingdom

Day 10 finds Sunday morning in the CBB House with Jim complaining to Lionel about how Luisa and Jasmine kept him up all night. The two targets of his ire hear him and complain to Linda how Jim is waking them up in the morning. He's suck a miserable man, they say. Jim tells BB in the DR that he won't get mad, he'll get even and starts quoting Shakespeare on revenge. Lee finds a butterfly in the bath and says it's spiritual. Luisa tells Jim his snoring keeps her awake. But I didn't enjoy it as much as you seemed to, Jim counters, you had a choice to keep me awake or not. But you told us to have fun, Luisa whines. Ollie is worried his outfit (black t-shirt, zebra-print trousers) is a fashion faux-paux. Luisa fancies Lee's bandmate Duncan but Lee tells her he's gay. Luisa says Lee is the second best looking member of the band. We sleep together, he jokes and Jasmine is shocked.

The afternoon finds the celebs transformed back to medieval times Lionel the leader of the Knights. Dappy is King of the Ninnyhammers, a bunch of foolish goblins. In the first battle, Ninnyhammer Dappy takes on Luisa the Knight, each protecting their meat tail (sausage links tied to their rear) from the ferocious jaws of the Big Brother Beast, a puppy with a lion's mane wrapped around his head. Liz thinks it's cruel. Dappy and Luisa scramble to keep the playful puppy from their sausage. Dappy's falls off first and the beast feasts. Luisa wins but Liz is worried that the dog was upset at being laughed at. His tail was wagging, she is assured, and he got the sausage.

The second game pits the teams in a test of sorcery as each must create a magic potion in the form of magical ingredients must be mixed according to instructions. Who's seen Breaking Bad, Jim jokes. The final ingredient causes a foam explosion and through the Ninnyhammers go first. the Knights go higher. BB decides the Knights had the most impressive potion. The final game is a joust between Ninnyhammer Lee and Knight Casey. They must each try to knock each other off their blocks by blindly pushing a pole through a wall and hoping to hit the opponent on the other side. Casey has 2 lifelines since the knights won the first two games and Lee has none. Casey takes the first hit and loses a lifeline. Lee dodges Casey's thrust. Casey loses a second time and the teams are now even, the next person off their rocker loses. Casey wins a feast for the Knights as Lee goes falling!

BB gathers the housemates in the living room and they anticipate Face-To-Face nominations. Lee begs everyone to not argue afterwards. Luisa doesn't think so but BB quickly corrects her. Casey asks if they have to be valid reasons? Yes, Linda says. Luisa goes first and nominates Jim because he's a right miserable bast*rd and is getting on her t*ts. Her second nomination is Liz for talking about dogs too much, driving her mental, go home and see your puppies. Jim nominates Luisa because she's manipulating everyone to focus on her, talking about how many companies she has and millions in the bank, she's bossy, arrogant, self-centered. His second nomination is Liz because he's sick of hearing about the dogs as well, her being homesick makes him homesick.

Jasmine nominates Liz pointed the finger at her when she tried to play a joke on Luisa by stealing her crown, so I want her to go. Her second nomination is for Jim for yelling at her and reprimanding him and because he's sexist. Dappy nominates Liz because you wanted to go home when we were handcuffed together and didn't take into account how much I wanted to stay. His second nomination is Luisa, we have to agree to disagree when she brought the most important woman in my life into the situation, my mother. Ollie nominates Liz because there are other housemates I would prefer to stay in the house because she's withdrawn a lot from conversations and discussions. His other nomination is Jim because of the animosity and division he has been involved in.

Lee is excited to nominate for the first time: Liz because he tried to get her to dance but she didn't want to participate. His second nomination is Sam because she enjoyed the sex games in the 18 club and wouldn't admit it. BB asks Lee if that's really the reason he wants to nominate Sam? Who do I flippin' nominate, he asks, I love everyone! BB refuses to accept the nomination. There's no proper reason for Sam, Ollie says. There's no proper reason for anyone, Lee squirms. It's not a joke, Linda says, she could go out! BB makes an exception and allows Lee to change his second nomination so he can be honest about it. Lee's second second nomination is Jim for arguing with the girls, creating a bad vibe. BB accepts his nomination.

Liz nominates Linda because she's like her older sister and that makes her nervous and she's intimidated by her. Her second nomination is Jasmine, looking at Jasmine makes her want to kill herself because she's so beautiful and all her self-esteem issues. Jasmine says my father committed suicide so maybe you could use a different choice of words. I really mean that, Liz says. That's pretty F***ing insensitive to say that, Jasmine says, that's just mean, it's not my fault the way I look. Sam nominates Liz because she took the thing with the dog during the trials today too far. Her second nomination is Jim because she's grown close to Linda and he's upset her and she's defending her when he makes Linda feel sh*t.

Linda nominates Jim, we wind each other up and there's no love lost between us. Her second nomination is Dappy, we haven't had a cross word between us but he doesn't integrate well with the group. Casey's first nomination is Liz because she's gotten to know her least in the house. And Jasmine because she was trying to create a row with Luisa and accuse her of things that were not true (during Sam's "acting" task). A nervous Lionel needs a sip of wine before making his nominations. He nominates Jasmine for her screaming and shouting, like chalk on a blackboard. His second nomination is Jim, whom he's known for 40 years, helped him on his way to stardom, but Jim is a leader and loves telling people what to do and when he doesn't, he's a miserable old git, a bloody good comedian but when he's not on, he's miserable.

BB tallies the results and facing eviction this week is Liz with 8 nominations, Jim with 7 nominations, Jasmine with 3 nominations and Luisa with 2 nominations. These four housemates will face the public vote this week. Dappy comforts Luisa who promises she never holds grudges. I'm going to be going now because of you, she jokes. Lee comforts Jasmine in the toilet, saying that for a long time Jasmine thought her father's suicide was her fault and it was insensitive for Liz to say that. Jim says it's hard to listen to the accusations. Casey defends her reasons. Luisa says Jim doesn't know how to deal with successful women like her.

Linda explains to Liz about Jasmine's father and Liz says she didn't know that. Luisa continues to spread the idea that Jim hates her for being a successful woman. Lionel agrees he's sexist. Jasmine tells Lionel and Luisa that she's not going to be nice to Liz anymore. Lee joins them and agrees it was insensitive. When are we getting married, Lee asks, changing the subject? Today, Jasmine jokes, then returns to dissing Liz. Lionel apologizes to Jim for nominating him and they share some wine. Sam and Casey think that Liz's comment to Jasmine will just drive Jasmine closer to Lee and she can't go anywhere. Sam says it's hard to see that rejection every day.

Jim tells Jasmine that he doesn't think Liz knew about her father and didn't mean to hurt you. Jasmine thanks him. Liz walks up and says I had no idea, I don't even know why I said it, I was trying to say something nice about you. Casey explains how she grew up feeling guilty and Liz says you mustn't. Jasmine says it's racist to discriminate against her about her looks. Liz says she was trying to say something horrible about herself. They hug and go their separate ways.

Lee holds Jasmine in the bath area, says I don't want you to go back to LA. Dappy and Luisa discuss their relationship and say it's sweet. Both of them just want someone to love them. Lee is very sensitive and she's good at being a bad girl, Luisa says. Lee and Jasmine move into the toilet and even with the water running, you can hear in between the kisses Lee promising to look after her and she promises to look after him.

Coming Up...

The only thing worse than nominations in the CBB House is face-to-face nominations and despite the protestations that it's just a game, the housemates were not feeling very sportsmanlike after Liz, Jim, Luisa and Jasmine were nominated for eviction. The great British public is voting and another celebrity will be evicted on Wednesday. In a game where the reasons you nominate could just as easily be the cause of your eviction as the reasons you are nominated, anyone cold be going home!

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and check out our full coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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Day Eleven - Some Celebrities Are More Equal Than Others

Jim is the first out of the bedroom to notice a huge 11 seat voting contraption. And that there's no food in the house. It's this week's Shopping Task, called The Democracy, where housemates must vote on a series of questions put forth to The Democracy. First question out of bed, would housemates rather live on bland grey slop or hot spicy curry? Housemates are not permitted to discuss voting strategy. Everyone but Jim votes for Curry. But BB says The Democracy voted for Slop. Individually, they are shocked. Jim heads back to bed as the housemates retrieve cans of Bland Grey Slop. Luisa gags at the smell and sight of it.

BB calls Jim to the DR and is informed that in the BB Democracy, some housemates are more equal than others and the only vote that really counts is his. Jim promises to not abuse the privilege. Jim says he meant to vote for curry! Jim must keep his power a secret - passing the Shopping Task is completely in his hands. The only food Luisa can find is old tea bags, but Dappy realizes there's no sugar. Luisa refuses to take Jim any tea. Lee and Jasmine get cozy snogging under the covers in the bedroom while Sam and Casey eat slop on the other side of the room. Sam takes pity on Casey and suggests they head out. Lee and Jasmine don't notice.

Linda can't stop talking about Jim's nominations, surprised she wasn't nominated. He wanted to get Luisa out, Lionel says. It's time for The Democracy to make their next decision. Who is the most boring housemate? The majority votes for Liz but Jim votes for Linda and that is what The Democracy decides. She faces retribution - a blue gunging in the living room, staring at a full length mirror and watching the paint dry. Jim asks her if she's OK. She doesn't answer. In the DR, Lionel says he voted for Linda because she never complains, her personality is bland. After 90 minutes, Linda's retribution is over. Lionel continues to push the notion to Sam and Jasmine that Jim wants to be the boss. The girls do not need any convincing.

The third round of The Democracy begins and Linda is still getting out of the shower. Would The Democracy prefer to sacrifice their cigarettes or their beautify products? Everyone votes to sacrifice cigarettes except Jim. BB announces The Democracy has chosen to sacrifice beauty products. Housemates are instructed to place their beauty products in the bucket and wipe the makeup off their faces, including their fake tans. Ollie says he would rather eat a testicle than play this game. Jim tells BB he's enjoying the game and the day so far, that his fellow housemates think BB is playing tricks on them and not him. Lee and Jasmine run to the tree house in the rain as Casey tells Sam this is exactly what Lee said he wasn't going to do.

Lee says it's nice to be able to kiss you whenever I want. Casey tells Linda and Ollie that Lee has lost her as a friend. Later in the living room, Jasmine is play-humping Lee on the floor when The Democracy calls. Who does the Democracy want to add one more to the list of four nominees. The housemates don't know that this is a fake nomination, however. The Democracy via Jim decides to nominate Lee, but the majority of the housemates voted for Lee as well. Jasmine finds lipstick and puts it on. Lionel and Linda are worried they are going to lose the whole task. Lee says don't shout at her.

It's still raining at 6pm as Dappy, Lionel and Ollie joke about in the garden. Casey tells BB in the DR she voted for Lee in The Democracy because of how Lee has been acting with Jasmine, but she's not going to make a scene in the house. Lee and Jasmine are back in the tree house remembering the good old days, when they first locked eyes all those days ago. I'm a witch, she says. Did you put a spell on me, Lee asks? Lionel has some alone time in the garden with a cigarette and a toot while Jasmine and Lee have some alone time themselves in the bedroom. Dappy, Ollie, Jim and Casey join Lionel in the garden. Jim says there's something funny going on with the game, something horrible or wonderful is going to happen.

That evening, Luisa is tipsy and thrusting her pelvis for Lee and Jasmine. Dappy enjoys the action as well when The Democracy alarm sounds and the housemates gather in the living room. Who are the two most annoying housemates? The majority chose Jim and Jasmine, but Jim's vote is the only one that counts and Luisa and Lionel are declared as the most annoying. They must spend the night in the most annoying room in the world, where the furniture is askew, the beds (in the shape of a human outline) aren't comfortable, and a hundred alarm clocks tick out loud. It's amazing, Luisa says, seeing the Legos in the carpet and chocolate & champagne locked away behind a cage. The pillows squeak when they lay their heads down. Luisa finds a key to a chain and they begin untying the knot.

In the bedroom, Jim calls a truce with Jasmine for calming down and chattering less, then apologizes for sounding condescending. She gives him a big hug. Lionel and Luisa release the chain with the key and find out that it reaches 1 meter short of the lock to the chocolates and champagne. The phone rings in the Annoying Room and it's an automated insurance robo call that doesn't respond to their answers to the annoying tone prompts. Luisa rocks cage to the chocolates and champagne in frustration. Lee and Ollie are secreted away in the toilet complaining about how other housemates are being fake to him.

Luisa begins climbing over the cage wall to reach the chocolate and champagne and BB orders her to get down. Luisa's stuck, she says. She falls down the inside of the cage, grabs the champagne and some glasses, hands them to Lionel through the cage bars, grabs the chocolates, then climbs back over. They begin eating the chocolates and pop the cork on the champagne, literally thumbing their nose at BB. BB calls Luisa to the DR for repeatedly ignoring BB's request to not climb on the cage. She says she doesn't regret her actions because either she gets evicted on Wednesday or gets nominated again on Friday. Lee tells Sam that it's all fun in the house, he knows what he has with Jasmine won't last.

Luisa returns to the Annoying room where one of the clocks is bleeping its alarm. She finds the clock and turns off the alarm. Then another one goes off. She drops the clocks on the floor. After 19 minutes of alarm clocks ringing, Lionel tells her to leave them alone but Luisa can't ignore the beeping and she can't figure out how to turn it off. Luisa lays down but every time she moves, her pillow squeaks. The rest of the house is enjoying a quiet evening with the most annoying housemates away for the night. Lionel is sleeping on the floor as the alarm clocks continue to beep and ring, driving the two most annoying housemates to uncontrollable giggles. Lionel thinks the phone is ringing and picks up the handset, telling the girl on the other end of the line to go F*** herself.

Coming Up...

While Lee thinks he is also up for eviction on Wednesday, only Jim, Liz, Luisa and Jasmine face the British public vote. Will it be the miserable old git Jim? Or will it be morose Liz? Or will it be in-your-face Luisa? Or will it be fem fatal Jasmine? Check back tomorrow night and be sure to tell your friends to come to Morty's TV for your Celebrity Big Brother UK fix!

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and check out our full coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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Day Twelve - Down And Out In The Celebrity Big Brother House

Face to Face nominations saw a battle of words that would rival any of Evander's four heavyweight championship fights. Then in this week's shopping task, The Democracy descended on the Celebrity Big Brother house as Lionel and Luisa are released from the Annoying Room and Ollie is so desperate for food he raids the crumbs in the bottom of the toaster. Lee and Jasmine enjoy a morning bath, their mouths clean inside and out. Lee plays with the golden rubber duckies. Lee tells Jim that Luisa is probably in trouble after their night together.

Luisa tells BB she would least have liked to share the Annoying Room with Jim because he annoys her (sounds like it would have been perfect). Sam admits to Linda that she finds Jim funny. Jim says to no one, nothing worse than a sober reality. Housemates were supposed to relinquish all beauty products but Luisa and Jasmine kept a secret stash. Did they think BB wouldn't notice? Casey confesses to Liz, Lionel, Sam and Linda that she dreams of BB. In the garden, Ollie lays down a rap for Dappy and Lee.

It's time to reveal the truth for this week's Shopping Task as BB reveals that only one vote counted in the BB Democracy. This housemate chose to live on slop, voted Linda the most boring instead of Liz, sacrificed beauty products, thought Luisa and Lionel were the most annoying pair instead of Jasmine and Jim. This housemate also chose to nominate Lee for eviction, but in this case, The Democracy was in agreement. But Lee is not actually up for eviction, they are told. It is now time for The Democracy to make one final vote - which housemate was secretly in control of the votes? The Democracy says Jim was The Decider.

Since housemates identified Jim as The Decider, he failed his secret mission and the house failed the Food Task and will receive only basic rations. Furthermore, Luisa stole champagne and chocolate from the most annoying room in the world and as a result, housemates will have no hot water or electrical appliances until further notice. Furthermore, due to continued flagrant violation of rules related to the use of beauty products which were supposed to have been sacrificed as part of the task, BB will not be returning housemates' beauty products.

Less than an hour later, Sam points the finger at Jasmine for still using concealer, lipstick and mascara since yesterday. Lionel says Luisa was so selfish, putting on mascara on this morning. Jasmine and Luisa complain about Lionel bitching about them, blaming Lionel for urging her to to get the chocolates last night. Ollie tells Luisa to call him out on it. Luisa blames Lionel for telling her to get the chocolates and didn't eat any, she just wanted the champagne. Dappy tries to move her away as Lionel comes right back at her blaming her for going after the champagne. You told me to! Am I your boss now? Why didn't you say no? Selfish bitches, Lionel says, then goes out to the garden where he continues to rant to Lee and Jim.

Lionel explains that he only told her to get the chocolates after she broke into the jail, he always stood up for Luisa and now she's lost a friend. In the living room, Luisa says a real man would admit when they were wrong and apologize. Jim says there's a difference between apologizing and not feeling it. Luisa says how do you know what I'm feeling? Shall we just queue up to you to have an argument, asks Jim, or do you just go willy nilly? Lionel is angry with himself for letting Luisa get to him. Jim says he's never bet a girl like that, she's scary. Dangerous, Jim says, she looks at the rules differently from the rest of us.

Jasmine and Luisa continue to blast Lionel for being bitchy as Ollie, Linda and Sam try to calm Lionel down but he still thinks Jasmine and Luisa are being selfish. Jasmine still hasn't taken off her mascara, Linda says. Luisa apologized for her actions, Linda says. Not to me, Lionel says. BB announces that basic rations are available. Jasmine and Luisa continue wallowing in self pity under the covers in the bedroom as the other housemates begin preparing a basic ration dinner. Ollie goes to get Luisa. She says she's not cooking for Jim or Lionel and won't make bread, he can just follow the directions on the package. Casey and Jim watch over Ollie's bread making. Luisa tells Lee and Sam she'll cook for everyone but Lionel and Jim. That's so F***ing petty, Lee says and marches off.

Half an hour later, Luisa is cooking for everyone but Jim and Lionel. Dappy doesn't understand these childish games, it's just food. Luisa says I'm fine being petty. Bollox to all of you, Jim says, this really is stupid. Jim tells Lee to take over the stove. Luisa says I'm only cooking for the people who don't hate me. Lee says who gives a shit? Jasmine tells BB in the DR that the house would think it's a victory if she and Luisa were evicted. Luisa and Lionel make up and Dappy signals victory. I fly off the handle sometimes, Luisa says. It will never happen again, Lionel says, I can be short tempered too but I can't bear a grudge with someone I like. They bond over how Jim must be loathing their getting along.

Casey gives Liz some beauty advice - don't wash your hair every day. Dappy warns Jasmine to not mess with his brother, Lee. Jasmine says it's sexy in a man when they are not afraid to be emotional. He makes me feel happy, Jasmine says, he can do that. Talking of the devil, Dappy says as Lee comes out. No, he's an angel, Jasmine says. She runs inside and Dappy repeats their conversation for Lee, and says you're lucky if that's the truth. She looked me in the eyes and there was no lie in it. We have something, I'm telling you, Lee tells him. Later, Jasmine and Lee snog on the dining room floor in front of all the other housemates. In the DR, Luisa tells BB that a lot of the animosity in the house comes from Jim.

The vote lines are now frozen, it's time to talk to the House and save a Celebrity. Jasmine, Jim, Liz and Luisa are all nominated. The viewers have spoken, your fate is sealed. The British public has voted to save... Jim!

Jim received the most votes to save, leaving Jasmine, Luisa and Liz still at risk of being evicted. The lines are re-opened and the British Public continues voting to save.

Back to yesterday's drama, Luisa, Jasmine, Lee and Dappy play a game of Truth or Dare. Jasmine dares Dappy to give Luisa a juicy kiss on the nick. There's a lot of gyration and dry humping involved. You know you liked it, Dappy says. In the DR, Liz tells BB she would not be missed in the house if evicted. In the garden, Ollie tells Sam she is far more beautiful without makeup. Back in the living room, Lee dry humps a bust. Casey has a heart to heart with Jim about how Lee and Jasmine are in her face 24x7. Jim tells her to not let it bother her, they won't last outside the house. Jasmine dares Dappy to put his head under Luisa's shirt and suck her nipples. They crack up as he does it. I done it, Dappy celebrates!

The votes lines are now closed for the final time tonight. It's eviction time and the results are in! It's time to talk to the House! Jasmine, Liz, and Luisa, the viewers have spoken, your fates are sealed. The Celebrity housemate with the least votes to save and second to be evicted is...


Liz can't believe she's still in the house. Lee is crushed as Jasmine says her goodbyes. Casey pretends to be sad Jasmine is leaving. She exits the house to a roar of boos and the music, "She's a man eater."

Before she leaves, Jasmine has one last task for Big Brother. It's time to talk to the house again. Emma tells them that they are all facing eviction on Friday, but tonight, two will be saved. The decision of which to lies in the hands of former housemate, Jasmine. Jasmine decides to save Casey and Linda. Jasmine says they would have fun together and everyone else she wants out there with her. As the credits roll, Jasmine's saves are the topic of conversation. Linda thinks that Jasmine thought they would turn the nominations around on her and it would be just Linda and Casey nominated and everyone else safe.

Coming Up...

Which stung Lee more, Jasmine's eviction or her not saving him from eviction tonight? Eight housemates, everyone except Linda and Casey, now face the British Public Vote. Or will BB throw in another twist? Stay tuned to Morty's TV and our coverage of Celebrity Big Brother UK!

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and check out our full coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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Day Thirteen - Celebrity Beat Down

It's the morning of Day 13 in the Celebrity Big Brother house and for one housemate, it's going to be an unlucky one. The housemates are being punished with no hot water or electrical appliances in the wash area due to Luisa and Lionel's rule breaking, and because of Luisa and Jasmine's continued use of makeup, BB has not returned their beauty products either. Ollie screams through a cold shower. Jim takes a quiet moment to apologize to Luisa for his comments the previous night. Jim tells Lionel he took example from him apologizing to Luisa last night. Luisa tells Linda Jim apologized then says she won't apologize back.

In the afternoon, Evander appears on the video screen to introduce a real knock-out task. Before the task, Lionel leads a boxing boot camp in the garden. Frustrations are the target as they take aim at the punching bag. It's the red team vs. the blue team and once the bodies are warmed up, it's time to test their minds. In the ring, BB will read a question and three potential answers will pop up. When the bell rings, both teams will shout directions to their blindfolded boxers to guide them to the correct answer.

Round One pits Ollie in the red trunks against Linda. Who described Jasmine and Luisa as selfish bitches? Blue team punches out Lionel first. The next round sets Lee in the red against Casey in the blue. Who said he had a slightly inappropriate crush against Sam? Lee punches Ollie to even the score. Sam takes on Linda, answering the question of who Lee was talking about when he said the first time he laid eyes on her his stomach went bzzzzzzzz? Sam beats Jasmine to the punch and blue team takes a 2-1 lead. Jim takes on Dappy, answering the question about which housemate Casey said now that she's acting like a little brat, she can have a taste of her own medicine. Jim barely tries as Dappy scores Jasmine for the blue team. It's Linda vs. Sam as BB asks who describes Lee and Jasmine as twats? Casey mouths that it was her and the blue team scores another point, and that is the knock-out blow in the task.

After 28 hours, BB relents on the punishments, returning hot water, electricity and beauty products to the bathroom. In the DR, Liz expresses frustration that none of the other housemates ever ask her about her work or background and the only way to get any attention is to shout like a child. Lionel and Jim make a point to stay in touch after the show. Lionel, in his 80s, says he has a longer life behind him than in front. You've enjoyed this, Jim says. I'd have never met a Dappy otherwise, Lionel says. Jim says that Ollie would be a good one to bring home, but does he like girls or boys? I don't know, says Lionel.

The housemates are gathered for the eviction as Emma announces that Jasmine has been evicted from the house. I'm going, right, Jasmine asks? Casey and Luisa seem shocked. Lee is stoically British. Before they can react, however, BB calls them back to the living room to announce they are all nominated for eviction next Friday and that Jasmine will save two of them. Jasmine chooses Linda and Casey. OMG, says Linda! She looks so beautiful, Lee says as the screen is turned off. Linda and Casey can't believe Jasmine gave them immunity but was so mean saying she wanted all the others to party with her. Lionel is glad they don't have to do nominations. Lee is certain he will be evicted next.

Lee moves on to the Anger stage, upset that Jasmine was booed as she left the house. Jim says punch me, get it all out. Lee thinks someone has played a really clever game and he's over it. Dappy comes out and asks over what? The bullshit, he says, some people are playing the game better than others, people have taken advantage of his wearing his heart on his sleeve. Dappy asks who? Casey, Lee says, it was she who wanted to be a couple at the start, she's fooled everyone playing the heart-broken girl to get what she wants.

Luisa is talking about how she loves raising her little girl and living in her girl's fairy life and Jim asks do you not miss having a man? Linda jumps all over him for making an inappropriate comment. Linda, Liz, Luisa and Casey discuss Jim's chauvinism, and Jim seeks commiseration with Dappy, Lionel and Lee for Linda's knocking him down again. Linda says she's never been two-faced but just when you think Jim is changing, he lets you down again. Jim says he has no nice left in him, that woman's off her head. Jim heads back in and makes nice, offering to take her plate, and she lights into him, saying he called her Linda a$$hole. Why are you doing this, Jim asks? I don't like you, she says, and you don't like me. Let's not pretend.

Lee continues his campaign against Casey, talking to Luisa in the garden about how Casey is behind Jasmine's eviction by first pretending they were in a relationship then pretending to have been heartbroken. Let's play, Lee says, but I'm about to turn her sh*t upside down. In the DR, Casey says Lee's upset and probably blames her because she said she wanted Jasmine gone but hopefully tomorrow he'll be fine. Luisa passes the report on to Linda and Sam that Casey wanted to have a fake showmance and was upset he didn't go along. Luisa advises Jim to not make comments to Linda that she can then twist against him. Jim says he's been nice to her, cooking her stir fry and everything, and this is what he gets. Ask her about Frank Carson's dressing room.

Luisa tells Linda what Jim says in the same breath she says she doesn't care. Linda says Frank Carson is her husband and Jim is being really underhanded dragging her dead husband into it. Linda is growing increasingly agitated and gets up to confront Jim. Oh no, Luisa says innocently, I feel terrible now. Oh no, Jim says, as Linda comes out. He denies saying anything about Frank Carson's dressing room. She tells him off, saying little secrets behind everyone's back. Jim says let's talk in the morning. I don't need to talk you at all. Luisa joins them as Jim continues to wonder what Frank Carson's dressing room has to do with anything? You little sh*t. The ladies leave and Jim continues to play dumb to Lee and Dappy.

Jim reveals to the boys that he had an argument with Linda's husband and that's why Linda hates him. Linda continues to rant in the bedroom about Jim bringing up her dead husband. Jim comes into the bedroom and says Frank Carson was a good friend of his. Luisa says you told me to ask about him. Did I, Jim asks? I just asked if it has something to do with Frank Carson's dressing room. Jim walks out and Linda cries that she feels so alone. Jim hears her say how low can he go and asks what is it he said about her husband. Later in the garden, Jim tells Ollie and Lee he didn't expect that. Lee says we are being judged on every single thing we do in here.

Linda tells Casey what Luisa told her that Lee said about her wanting to have a showmance and play the game with him. Sam says he doesn't want to talk talk to you about it. Nobody has any balls in here, Luisa tells Sam. I'm going to talk to him, Casey says, because that's wrong. Outside, Lee says part of me wants to just leave and see if there really is something with Jasmine. Casey is fuming in the bedroom now, saying Lee humiliated me and now is trying to paint her as a bad person? How dare he! Just because his girl is gone and she got booed, to turn it around and make it my fault, make me nasty person. How could he do that?

Coming Up...

The British voting public have their work cut out for them, with Dappy, Jim, Lee, Lionel, Liz, Luisa, Ollie and Sam all up for eviction on Friday. With each jockeying for position as both victim and villain, who will be evicted and who will survive into week 3? Will any of the Celebs be on speaking terms with the other housemates by finale night? And will Liz ever figure out why fans keep voting for her to stay in the house?

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and check out our full coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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Day Fourteen - Facing The Final Curtain

Tonight is the big headline fight we've all been waiting for - 8 Celebrities on the ropes. Who will become the third evicted housemate?

It's the morning after the night before and the tension in the house hasn't thinned between Lee and Casey and Linda and Jim. Casey is upset with Lee for saying that she's upset he wouldn't fake a showmance with her, and Linda is upset that Jim asked Luisa to ask Linda if an incident involving her diseased husband is the reason she hates him. Jim makes a weak attempt to apologize that is ignored by Linda. Lee tells Ollie he's still bothered by Jasmine's eviction and the way she was booed. Sam wonders if Jasmine and Lee have a chance outside the house. Linda tells BB that she doesn't think she and Jim will ever make up and doesn't know if she can enjoy her remaining time in the house. Sam gives Lionel a golden glow (spray tan). Linda opens up to Lee about her argument with Jim, about how her husband was accused of stealing 25 quid and he plead guilty to avoid the embarrassment of a trial. I don't get the correlation of the two, Lee says. It's just kick her while she's down, she says.

It's live eviction #3 and the vote lines are now frozen.

It's early afternoon and Lee is in the DR saying he feels completely played by Casey, that he told her he liked Jasmine and she said she was OK with it but now Jasmine's gone and good on her. Casey continues to bash Lee in the bedroom for his claiming she was in the house for the publicity. Luisa and Ollie tell her to talk to him but she doesn't want to have anything to do with him. She begins crying as she talks about how she comforted him in the Bolt Hole and this is how she treats her. Ollie asks how will she resolve it? She won't, Casey says, they will leave the house and never speak again.

As an online columnist, Liz is called to the DR for today's task where she has to write an open letter to her fellow housemates, and gives her Dappy as her assistant and secretary. Liz isn't wild about the choice of Dappy. They go into the task room and Liz tells Dappy to write down everything the housemates say as she interviews them. She interviews Lionel, Casey, and Jim about the feud between Jim and Linda, and the love triangle between Lee, Jasmine and Casey. Liz interviews Dappy to get his version of events, furiously scribing her story. Liz delivers her article, 12 Angry Men And Women. After quickly dealing with the Jim and Linda spat and letting Jim off the hook, she goes into juicy details on the Lee, Casey and Jasmine triangle, coming down squarely on the side of Casey.

When she's done, Lee quickly walks out to the garden by himself. Dappy follows him and Lee asks how was Casey able to tell Liz what he said when he never said it to her? Dappy admits he told Linda who told her. Dappy apologizes and Lee says it's all right. Lee insists she (Casey) was "on me" in the Bolt Hole no matter what she says. He comes into the house and Luisa asks innocently if she's OK and he says no, he just wants to get out of here.

Two celebrities are about to breath a sigh of relief as we tell the two with the most votes to save that they are safe. It's time to talk to the house. Dappy, Jim, Lee, Lionel, Liz, Luisa, Ollie, and Sam, the viewers have spoken, your fate is sealed. I can now reveal the two housemates with the most votes and therefore safe from eviction, in no particular order, are...

Jim, you are safe! Sam, you are also safe!

Dappy, Lee, Lionel, Liz, Luisa and Ollie, one of you will be evicted tonight. Who do you want to keep under lock and key a little while longer? The lines are reopened and the British Public is again voting to save.

Back to yesterday in the house, Luisa tells Liz that Dappy's upset that Lee's upset with him for repeating a private conversation to Linda who told Casey. Dappy tries to clear the air with Lee, telling Lee to confront Casey. Lee says no, she's telling everyone he made out with her in the Bolt Hole. Someone's lying, Dappy says. Lee says he's been trying to get rid of her since the chains came off but she won't let him be happy. Lee packs his clothes then tells Luisa he's going to the loft to be alone. Dappy asks Casey in the living room who's lying? So I'm faking everything, Casey asks indignantly?

BB calls Dappy to the DR to settle an old score with Luisa: Could Dappy really beat Luisa in an IQ test? Dappy is scared and doesn't want to play. BB asks both housemates a series of the questions in English, Math, Science, Geography and General Knowledge. Whoever scores highest will be named the most intelligent CBB Housemate and rewarded. Luisa says she will be so embarrassed if it's not her. Dappy gets one question right. Luisa struggles to spell intelligence. Dappy rushes out of the DR when the test is over. BB gathers the housemates in the living room to reveal the results. She wins, Dappy says, I'm more streetwise than book-wise. The average score is 63%, BB says, Dappy scored 6% and Luisa scored 69%. I'm above average, Luisa says. BB says Dappy will suffer a punishment for being less intelligent. BB provides costumes for both to wear - Dappy has a dunce cap and Luisa gets a large gold star.

Voting is now closed but for Jim and Linda, making up is still very hard to do as the housemates head to sleep before today's eviction. Jim makes another attempt at a sincere apology and Linda says it is what it is. Goodnight, love, Jim says. It's raining in the garden, but Luisa tucks Lee into a makeshift bed on the couch in the loft. Lee says he's been polite to everyone but one person has had it out for me and I'm done, I'm getting out of here. Luisa says don't you see how kissing two girls is wrong? Lee says she kissed me in the Bolt Hole and I pulled away. Luisa tries to get him to return to the house, says it may be Casey who looks bad on the outside.

Dappy goes to the DR and threatens to leave the house if they air the IQ test. He's not stupid, he's a strong rapper with the English language, he couldn't have sold 3 million albums if he's stupid. Lee and Ollie are outside looking for Dappy. Is he having a wank, Lionel asks? Dappy continues to be upset with BB making him look stupid, he wants to leave and go make another album. BB refuses to negotiate what is and isn't aired and suggests he sleep on the issue. He threatens to leave tomorrow (today) at 1pm if they don't promise not to air it. He comes downstairs and is told Lee and Ollie think he's playing hide and seek. He goes into the bedroom where Lee and Ollie see him through the window. He looks pi$$ed, doesn't he, they say.

It's midnight as Dappy takes a timeout in the garden. Lee tells BB that he's isolated himself from the group to figure out how to handle the situation he's in. Half of him doesn't really want to go, he's always been a fighter in life, didn't get where he's gotten to without having that tenacity to go forward and take what life throws at you. Today has been the saddest and loneliest in the house and he's had enough of the upset and bullsh*t. He wants the fun back.

Two more Celebs are about to get their posteriors saved. It's time to talk to the house. Dappy, Lee, Lionel, Liz, Luisa and Ollie, the viewers have spoken, you're fate is sealed. For the last 48 hours, the British public has been voting to save. I can now reveal that the next two housemates with the most votes and safe from eviction, in no particular order, are...

Ollie and (Lionel's name can be heard chanting from the audience) Dappy!

Ollie and Dappy you are both safe. Lee (Stop booing me, he shouts back), Lionel, Liz, Luisa, for one of you it's curtains. It's eviction time, forget Kate Moss's 40th, this is where the party's at! It's time to talk to the house.

CBB House, Lee, Lionel, Liz, Luisa, the viewers have spoken, your fate is sealed. For the last 48 hours, the British public has been voting to save. I can now reveal that the Celebrity housemate with the least votes and third to be evicted is...


WTF, Lee says. Lionel has lost his place in the CBB House. Dappy can't believe it. Lionel kisses all the girls goodbye, says bye to Jim, Lee and the other guys. Ollie is shocked. Lionel dances his way up the stairs, the housemates chanting his name from the living room. He exits onto the outdoor stage to loud cheers, twirling a magically appearing cane and reaching over the railing to shake a fan's hand. With the grace and elegance of a gentleman, he sashays his way down to the paparazzi platform a free man.

Coming Up...

Lionel is emotional outside of the house: I've just seen my son and daughter, and my agent. Well at least Lionel has his priorities set. While Evander's eviction didn't come as a surprise, Jasmine and Lionel have been two surprises. With two weeks behind us and just a week ahead, what other surprises does BB and the housemates have in store? Or will tonight's shocking eviction lead to peace, calm and serenity over the weekend?

During his exit interview, Lionel reveals that earlier tonight, he overheard Casey telling Luisa to keep it up, she's on camera now. With Lee getting such solid boos tonight, could it be that Lee's been right all along?

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and tell your friends to check out our full CBBUK coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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Day Fifteen - Celebrity SuperFan

This is the story of Lionel's final day in the Celebrity Big Brother House. It's 10am and BB raises the shutters on the 8 housemates facing the public vote. Dappy, who had threatened to walk out of the house yesterday, is still in the house. Jim tells him he's glad. Ollie says he's packed to go. BB calls him to the DR. He says he feels isolated and out of the game, and if the IQ test is going to get aired, he's going to go. He's leaving in an hour or staying. He goes to finish packing. Jim tells a photo of his wife he'll see her tonight. He says after this experience, he'll never argue with his wife again.

Dappy has been contemplating for 90 minutes. Lionel is in the DR doing impressive impressions of his fellow housemates and BB is guessing who he's doing. Luisa, Lee and Ollie are in the kitchen making rude food. Luisa says she can still squeeze out breast milk (she has a child) and takes Ollie and Lee into the toilet to show them. Lee says he can do it too and pinches his nipple to demonstrate. You're not meant to lactate, Ollie protests. Jim tells Linda that Dappy is getting even more agitated, he has a bee in his bonnet about something. Dappy is making his bed.

Lee and Casey kiss and hug. I still hate you sometimes, he tells her. I hate you too, she says. We have the worst love-hate relationships. Lee says he got upset that she seemed to be gloating over Jasmine's eviction. Casey says she never said anything bad about him. Lee says I'm going tonight and I don't want to leave angry. Ollie and Luisa try to cheer up Dappy with breasts and penises made out of bread. Oh, Jim's balls fell off! Ollie says Lee's hung like a squirrel.

Lee and Luisa tell Dappy that he's not going anywhere, Lee's going to get evicted. He doesn't harbor things in the head he doesn't use, he has music in his head. Ollie and Sam agree to be each other's rocks in the last week of the game. Dappy goes to the DR to tell BB that he's back in the game. He was embarrassed yesterday with the whole test thing but he he harbors what he utilizes in life, song writing. Need I say no more, he says?

The housemates gather in the garden for today's task in which Ollie and Lee will compete against to meet their very own SuperFans by becoming their own SuperFans and completing an assault course. First they have to clear the security barrier before crawling through muddy bushes to avoid the CCTV cameras, then get past the security guards to search a rubbish bin to find a pair of their idol's pants. Then they must scream their adoration to SuperFan level and climb into the SuperFan mansion to meet their hero. The fastest SuperFan wins. Ollie completed the challenge in 1:15 but the winner with the time of 1:12 seconds is Lee! But what Lee doesn't know is his very own SuperFan won't be what they seem.

Ollie tells Lionel he thinks it will be a double eviction. Lionel says I wouldn't know who, maybe me and Luisa. Too entertaining, Ollie thinks. In the DR, Sam says Ollie makes her laugh and they are quite flirty with each other. Luisa, Linda and Liz are talking Lee and Casey. After all the tears, Luisa says, it's very odd they are back together today. Maybe it's crocodile tears, she suggests. Linda seems shocked at the idea.

Lee goes to the DR to have afternoon tea with his SuperFan. But the fan is actually an actress and the other housemates have been let in on the secret and will be feeding questions to her via an earpiece. If they dupe Lee, they win a reward. Lee enters to meet his SuperFan who tells him he's a great hugger. She tells him she won an internet competition doing one of his songs and she sings it to him on an out-of-tune guitar as his housemates watch from the living room, laughing at Lee. Ollie tells the SuperFan to ask if he's disappointed she's not Jasmine and the SuperFan runs with it. Did you have sex with Jasmine is the next question? Just cuddles, he says. It was really romantic, she tells him. She asks him about Casey next and Lee says he loves both girls.

Luisa suggests having the SuperFan to make up that Luisa has said in the DR that Lee and Jasmine were fake and that she's been siding with Casey. Lee says he trusts Casey 100%. The housemates direct the SuperFan to ask Lee if Dappy's willy is as big as they say but Lee says he's never seen it but they made up a song about it and he sings it to her. Lee and his SuperFan hug and he thanks her because he may be leaving tonight and this was wonderful. The housemates all disperse before Lee returns to hide the fact they were watching. It was a proper fan, Lee tells them, who won a SuperFan competition. He says he kept feeling she was a journalist for asking so many questions. Lionel says she kept touching her thing and but Lee doesn't indicate if he realized they had watched.

BB calls the housemates to the living room and reveals that Rebecca wasn't really a SuperFan and asking the housemates' questions. You bastards, Lee says! That's hilarious! BB says the housemates successfully completed their tasks and wins the house a selection of fantastic fast food.

It's time for the eviction and Lee tells everyone he's had a great time up and down. Me too, Lionel says. Lee revels in his boos and Lionel in his cheers as Liz and Luisa get mixed reactions. I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, Lee says. But it is Lionel who is evicted. WTF, Lee says? No, Liz says. Dappy doesn't understand. I did not see that, Lee says, no! He gives Lionel a hug and says he loves him. Jim stands back and smiles as Lionel heads up the stairs. Lionel pulls out a handkerchief at the top of the stairs and after stepping through the door, magically transforms it into a cane.

Liz says he was entertaining. Jim says I've known him over 30 years, he's entertaining in small doses. He tells Liz they'll look after each other. Sam, Jim, Dappy and Linda have had a few drinks. Jim tells Linda she can pull wine from her a$$ and Linda gives him a dirty look. No, Jim says, I hid a bottle under the cushion! Dappy says I want to run away whenever you two argue. Maybe we should argue again, jokes Linda. In the DR, Lee reflects on the boos and chants to Get Lee Out from the audience. Liz tells the other housemates she didn't have sex until she was 32, not even with her husband. How was it, Jim asks? How did you do that, Luisa wonders. She says she felt no one would like her until she was perfect. You weren't in love with him, Linda says. Liz says she's had loads of help.

Casey gives Luisa permission to tell Liz that Casey's first orgasm was at 32 and she's never orgasmed with a man. Linda says first sex was at 20 with her husband. Luisa says but women should have loads of sex. Linda says she had loads of sex with other men but her husband was always there. And believe me Casey, then you orgasm! Jim can't take the talk and walks out of the room. Dappy is missing Lionel and sings a song in the bedroom. Luisa decides to take Liz to a sex party but Liz says she'll only watch. A Lord Lionel Blair song opens up in the garden and Dappy joins them. Dappy, Luisa and Casey are all singing and dancing in the rain as Jim tries to sleep in the bedroom. Dappy takes off his shoes and jumps into the Jacuzzi, and Luisa joins him, both still singing at the top of their lungs.

Dappy and Luisa warm up in the bedroom, Luisa in the shower, Dappy naked except for a shirt over his front. He puts on his trunks and joins Luisa in the shower. They are still singing. Look at those g*damn boobs, Dappy shrieks! Ollie doesn't understand how Dappy is that pi$$ed. Dappy says he doesn't want her and Luisa to be the first having sex. We're not having sex, Luisa says. Then she says OMG and they begin shrieking and singing the Dappy's D*ck song. Jim has moved to the tree house lodge to try to sleep. The rest of the housemates are preparing for bed as Dappy pretends to molest Luisa. It's all fake, Linda announces, she's not even wincing. This is not normal, Ollie disclaims as Lee and Dappy try to see whose package shakes more underneath their briefs.

Jim has moved into the living room and Dappy asks what's wrong. He says he's waiting for everyone else to go to sleep. Dappy apologizes for screaming. No, you're all right, Jim says. No more noise, Dappy says. Everyone be quiet because Jim's coming to bed now, Dappy announces. Oh dear, Jim says. BB shuts off the light and Jim enters the bedroom walking slowly through the mess. You look like the grim reaper walking through the room, Luisa says. Jim turns around and lays down by the door. Jim's collapsed by the door, Luisa says. Grow up, Luisa, he says.

Coming Up...

So Jim & Liz and Casey & Lee have formed protective alliances for the final week in the CBB House but will housemates making nice face to face stab each other when backs are turned? Could it be the housemates are making nice because nominations are coming and the remaining nine celebrities all want to make it to the Final 5?

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and tell your friends to check out our full CBBUK coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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Day Sixteen - Laughter & Resentment

It's Day 16 and the house makes up without Evander, Jasmine and Lionel. The night before, Luisa's antics kept Jim up yet again. This morning, he gets even by making loads of noise after waking up early. Jim makes a cup of coffee then throws the spoon onto the floor. Linda and Sam join Luisa in enjoying Jim being upset. Luisa says he gives me so much fuel to annoy him. Jim tells BB that his housemates have made a sport out of making him uncomfortable and Luisa is not the type of person he'd ever want to meet again. An hour later, Luisa decides to make a human orchestra using glassware and utensils in the kitchen. Jim hides in the tree house loft. Luisa says I have another game, things to do to pi$$ off Jim today. In the loft, Jim can hear the racket and says I wonder who that could be?

Dappy is concerned about Jim who tells him he slept on the floor by the door. Jim says Luisa sees it as a sport now, she doesn't care about anyone's feelings. Luisa tells BB that her aim is to pi$$ Jim off so he doesn't speak to her. She says Jim is the biggest game player here. She says Ollie has no opinion on anything. She says her fellow housemates are starting to crumble. Everyone, it seems, is trying to win the game. Except her of course, she's just being real.

Today's task is a talent show competition, In The Limelight. Jim, Linda and Luisa will be judges, Liz will be a fashion critic, Lee is composing a song about his time in the house, Sam and Ollie will act out a constructed improv reality scene using a series of props BB will reveal at the last moment, Dappy will perform his #1 single, No Regrets, and Casey will defend glamour modeling (with Jim's comedic help). The stage is set, the performers are ready, it's time to welcome your host, Mr. Jim Davidson!

Jim introduces Luisa and Linda, the guest judges, with some rehearsed thinly veiled bad humor. Liz is the first to perform, with her biting stand-up critique of each of the housemates. Luisa gives her an 8. Jim gives her an 8. Linda disagreed with some of her comments and gave her a 6. With his acoustic guitar, Lee performs his original song, Raw By The Moon. He's nervous at the start but quickly gets his groove, Dappy laying on the floor holding up a white board with the lyrics. He gets a standing ovation. Linda expected more and gives him an 8. Jim thought it was fantastic and gives him a 9. Luisa says he touched her in places she never knew and gives him a 10.

Casey is next to perform as Racy Casey talking about herself with a rude and crude take on why glamour models are role models. Jim says she'll be a comedy star and gives her a 10. Luisa gives her an 8. Linda says if you got it, flaunt it, and gives her an 8. Dappy takes the stage next, singing No Regrets with no backup or music but he gives it a professional pop rock effort, leading his fellow housemates to sing along. Jim says he took his breath away and didn't know how wonderful he was, so he gives him a 10. Luisa loved Dappy's d*ck grab at the end and gives her a 9. Linda gives him a 9 because his bong was hanging out.

Ollie and Sam are the final housemates to face the judges, improvising a reality scene while incorporating a series of secret props hidden in a bag. They create a scene in which Ollie cheats on Sam in a scene eerily reminiscent of Casey and Lee, that involves Linda and Jim as alternate paramours, and Ollie on his knees in pumps with a marriage proposal. Luisa gave them a 10 for making her cry with love. Linda says she only watches Ollie making bread because he does it with his top off and gives them a 10. Jim says that was great acting and gives them a 9 only because it's what they do for a living.

Jim announces the winners of In The Limelight are... Ollie & Sam! They win a statuette and the house earns a party later that night.

Dappy gets comfortable in the judges' chair giving out scores to imaginary performers. The rest of the house is getting ready for the part. Luisa says they'll be quiet if he asks politely. Jim says I thought it would just be manners if you partied outside and was quiet in the bedroom. The table in the kitchen is laid out with loads of party finger food, some labeled Suitable For Vegetarians, that seems to excite everyone but Jim. I'm going to bed, he says and returns to the bedroom and crawls into bed. His absence is noticed then dismissed.

After the eating, Jim returns to the kitchen and sits with Liz as Lee runs in amped up to get another beer. Lovely, Jim says as BB pumps dance music into the house and the other housemates are dancing on the beds in the bedroom. Jim mockingly sings along with the song in the kitchen. The party moves back into the kitchen with more music. Jim is not amused in the DR, saying his perfect night is anything but drinking cheap wine and dancing. Back in the house, Lee demonstrates some skills as a dance partner with Casey. Jim says he doesn't like dancing, guys only do it to fit in and impress girls. He doesn't think they really want him at the party and the only way the evening could improve is if he dies.

It's after midnight and Luisa has put her earrings into her bra to accentuate her nipples. Ollie says it's so realistic. Watch the boys' faces Casey says. Dappy comes over and Casey positions him in a position to get an inebriated close look. She's been playing them for half an hour, Ollie tells him. Liz heads off to bed. Dappy heads to the DR and slurs to BB how Luisa gets through security at the airport with those nipples. He's never sat between to beautiful women like that with such a set of perfect knockers. He returns to the living room and notes they're still aroused. She shows him the earrings and he says I knew it!

Jim has changed clothes and is in the living room talking to Lee and Casey who tells him that they tell glamour models to stay away from people like Lee. He makes a comment and she jumps all over him. He could still end up with her, Jim teases. Too much has happened, Casey says. You lie like a cheap watch, Jim says. We're just friends, Casey says. I'm your friend and you don't jump on me like that, Jim deadpans. Friends with benefits, Casey says. He could have you anytime he wants, Jim says and Lee laughs. Luisa pops into the conversation and asks Casey if she still fancies Lee? Casey says she needs more wine than this before she answers.

Coming Up...

Sunday's highlights are coming up tomorrow in the CBB house and after a day when the only fight was improvised between Sam and Ollie, nominations are going to be a peace of cake, right? There's a better chance of Labour and Torries singing Kumbaya. With thoughts of finale night in the housemates' heads, let's hope the celebrity claws come out!

Keep your eyes tuned right here to the Morty's Fan Forums & Chat for your latest CBBUK news and tell your friends to check out our full CBBUK coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk!

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In case you are thinking Celebrity Big Brother UK should be wrapping up this week, you were right. But it seems that depravity and insensitivity among celebrities are big ratings booster and the season has been extended 5 days to January 29th. If you haven't been watching, check out our coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk to see what has everyone in Great Britain talking!


Who asks, who says celebrities can't let their guard down...

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Day Seventeen - Getting Tactical

Oh, still here, Jim says, groaning as he wakes up. Dappy has something for LuLu in the bathroom as he shakes his third leg for her. Luisa picks an argument with Jim over whether wives iron their husbands' shirts. Jim says most women iron their husbands' shirts. We're not in the 1950's, Luisa says, why don't husbands iron their own shirts? Because they're stupid and haven't got a clue, Jim says. Later, he welcomes viewers into Real Man as he washes his laundry in the bathroom sink.

Dappy is called to the DR. Nominations has begun. He nominates Liz for being boring, and Linda for sleeping all day long after calling him out for the same. Sam nominates Liz because they never get anything back from her, and Lee for acting childish after Jasmine left. Liz tells Jim she doesn't iron her husband's shirts either. What's happening to the world, he asks. Linda nominates Jim because sorry isn't enough, and Liz because of her biting comments during the Talent Show. Ollie nominates Liz for not giving very much, and Jim because he's involved in all the arguments in the house. Lee nominates Jim for being a party pooper, and Liz because she said some pretty awful things during her fashion critique.

Jim tells Casey that if he thinks he's right, he goes off the handle about it, he can't stand injustice. Casey says you're a bit defensive now. I'm an easy target, Jim says. He's talking about a recent arrest outside the house, he was in a cell for 3 hours before he found out what he was accused of. That was bloody awful, Casey says. Later, Lee and Casey lay onto the bed. Let's have sex, Casey jokes.

Luisa nominates Jim for being sexist and dealing backhanded insults, and Liz for being homesick and bringing her down. Casey nominates Liz for moaning about queuing for the toilets and never dancing when others want fun, and Jim for being grumpy when everyone else is up late and loud. Liz nominates Jim for ignoring her, and Sam for not making an effort to talk to her. Jim nominates Luisa for making him on edge and creating an argument out of everything he says, and Sam because if she vanished for 2 days you'd never know she's gone.

BB gives Luisa a secret mission to get Dappy to rap along with her, then to get Jim to disagree with her and third, to make Liz laugh and finally, get Liz to compliment her. What she doesn't know is the rest of the house has been told her secret mission and told the real mission is to not let Luisa succeed in any of her tasks. First she fishes for a compliment from Linda and hits a stone wall. Then she fails to get a rise out of Jim despite repeated attempts. Dappy tells Luisa his manager told him not to rap in the house. Luisa returns to the DR to say they're all so boring and why is Jim being so nice to me? BB tells her she has 15 minutes remaining.

Jim, Lee and Dappy are hiding from Luisa in the loft. Jim says agreeing with Luisa is breaking my F*king heart. Luisa finds Liz in the bathtub but instead of making her laugh, Liz tells her she's crying over her dead cat Squeaky and now she's worried her other cat has died. And her mother. If I had a car, she says, I'd drive into a tree. Instead of making her laugh, Luisa is trying to cheer her up. My boyfriend's run off with another woman, I just know it, Liz says, I'll be the first to come our of the house without any friends. I just want to make you laugh, Luisa says. I need valium, Liz say, I wonder how hard it is to drown in a bathtub (with about 5" of water). I've got that disease where you're never happy.

BB calls the housemates together to reveal to Luisa her fellow housemates' secret task to make her fail all her missions. She says she tried so hard to complete her tasks then laughs when she realizes why. As a prize, the house gets a Sunday roast for dinner.

One of the housemates has not been flushing the toilet and Detective Linda ferrets out Dappy as the culprit. He says sorry about that. Jim says the other housemates have messed up timing for dinner, food is going to be ready too early. Inside, Linda says she'll wash up after dinner. Dappy is upset with Luisa for calling him out on the toilet. Luisa asks Jim for his advice on one thing but when he ventures an opinion on the spuds she jumps all over him. Jim and Dappy console themselves over being in Luisa's doghouse.

Dinner is over and Jim thinks he'll go before Liz. Luisa doesn't understand why Jim gets more votes than her. Jim admits to be sexist but says he doesn't put her down. Luisa says women must not vote, that's the only way he gets more votes than her. A couple more days, Jim says, and you'll never have to see him again, just try to get through it.

It's time to reveal the result of today's nominations. The first housemate facing eviction is... Sam. BB plays a video of all the housemates who nominated her and why. Luisa says it's a tactical nomination. The second housemate facing eviction is... Liz. She sees that everyone in the house but Ollie nominated her and why. This is hideous, Ollie says. This is not hatred, Jim says. The next housemate facing eviction is... Jim. He pretends to not listen then smiles as his fellow housemates rip him apart. Thanks, Jim tells them. I feel sick, Dappy says. I'm out, Liz says hopefully! Sam won't go in a million years, Jim says. People aren't supposed to vote like that (tactically), Linda says.

Jim goes off to the loft alone. Liz says she voted tactically so she would get evicted. Linda says everyone votes differently. Liz says she doesn't dislike Sam, why is everyone giving me the stink eye when everyone voted for me?

Nominations fallout continues as Dappy remixes a New Orleans classic, singing I'm In The Mood for Dancing. Jim dishes on the reaction with BB in the DR, saying Sam is upset, Liz reacts like a Vulcan, and Luisa doesn't understand why women keep voting for him to stay. Murderers get less punishment than him in the house with Luisa. Ollie tells Sam she has an amazing fan base and they'll pick up the phone for, no one inside or outside the house wants her to leave, there's no reason for it. Liz doesn't wonder why people are so desperate to be liked all the time. Luisa agrees, that's just who she is. Liz says Luisa's the only whose asked her about her work. Luisa says everyone else is too self-obsessed to be interested in Liz's career. She thinks she could be a good journalist because she cam be brutal too.

Some of the housemates, including Jim, are asleep in the bedroom. Luisa tells Linda in the living room that she regrets calling Dappy a wannabe gangster; he's a full blown gangster. Is he, Linda asks? Fully blown? Casey and Lee are spooning and wonder if it's a double eviction, would Sam leave? They don't understand why Jim didn't nominate people he disliked. In the DR, Ollie in his Union Jack onesie says both Luisa and Jim voted tactically and he doesn't think it's fair but some want to win a lot more than others do, and that is slightly more worrying.

Coming Up...

The next round of celebrity nominations are set and barring another twist by Big Brother, either Jim, Liz or Sam will be evicted on Wednesday. Who goes? The Brits will decide! If you haven't been watching, check out our coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk to see what has everyone in Great Britain talking!

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Day Eighteen - The Dogs Of War

Day 18 gets off to a frosty start in the Celebrity BB House as Dappy doesn't understand why none of the others gets along with Jim. Jim says it's because he's the oldest and set in his ways. He tells Dappy that if he keeps hanging out with him and wasn't sexist when he came in (to the house), he'll be sexist when he leaves.

A frigid cold has come over the CB house as the garden has been transformed into the cold and white of the arctic north. As part of this week's shopping task, housemates must undertake an epic journey to the North Pole on a husky-pulled sled. Jim, Linda, Liz, Ollie and Sam are the polar explorers, warm in their fur. Casey, Dappy, Lee and Luisa are the huskies, warmed by their animal fur outfits. The four huskies must pull at least 2 of the polar explorers at all times in a circle around the snow-filled backyard. During a break, the explorers have access to snacks and hot drinks while the huskies get bowls of dog food. We do all the pulling and get all the shit, Casey says. Jim decides not to eat the treats in support of the huskies, which for some reason really bothers Linda.

To earn extra time for the task's finale tomorrow, housemates will undergo a series of tasks. In Brain Freeze, Explorer Linda will answer questions and her faithful huskies, Caesy, Dappy, Lee and Luisa, must drink her answers in ice-cold shots without succombing to a brutal brain freeze. Time is earned by each huskie that survives. The other housemates watch as the huskies must drink both liquid and ice. Lee is having a very difficult time and pulls out of the task. The other three complete the task successfully and win an additional 50 seconds on the clock in the final task.

Jim gives Ollie and Dappy a cooking lesson in the kitchen but maintains he will not eat unless his doggie (Dappy) eats. Liz tells BB she's the carer of the Huskies making sure they are not being abused. During the trek, the polar explorers hear the sounds of a distressed seal and must chain up their huskies in case of a dangerous polar bear. Jim attacks the stuffed polar bear in the garden while the dogs whimper in distress while the explorers pile onto the sled for safety. A worn out Lee tells BB that as a huskie, he doesn't like humans.

The second task in the challenge involves ice fishing, with the polar explorers catching the fish and the huskies must move them to a bucket with their teeth. The ice cold sea food comes out of the hole in the ice on a string and using their mouths, the huskies must pull them off the string and drop them into the bucket. Casey has a particularly difficult time. Housemates caught enough fish to earn another 30 seconds on the clock for the final task.

BB informs the housemates that the huskies are outdoor dogs and must bed down in the outdoor kennel. The huskies walk dejectedly out into the garden and Jim promises to sleep outside in sympathy. I can't do it, Lee says. Linda says maybe we'll suffer tomorrow. The huskies crawl into the kennel which turns out to be a tunnel to the Mutt's Nutts, a warm and cozy boozer. Dappy is shocked, Casey and Luisa excited. Lee reads out the room service menu. They quickly dig into the bowls of nuts and pop the tops on some beverages.

Meanwhile, the polar explorers eat a meal of rice & lentils prepared by Jim, who still refuses to eat. Linda and Sam think Jim is being ridiculous. In the Mutt's Nuts, the housemates are playing darts, drinking beer and ordering gourmet off the menu while watching the their masters on the video screen. Linda continues to come down on Jim for trying to be the martyr. Liz thinks he's just trying to curry favor. Dappy says Jim is honorable and decides he's not going to eat their food unless Jim eats.

The polar explorers wait for their huskies to return for more sledding, who are worried their masters will smell the alcohol on their breath. They hide the Mutt's Nuts from the explorers as Dappy urges Jim to eat and not starve himself for him. After 38 minutes, the housemates take a break and the huskies urge Jim to eat. He agrees to eat but promises to not enjoy it. BB announces that the weather has taken a turn for the worst and huskies are sent to the kennel for the night. Jim goes to the kitchen and grabs a spoonful of rice & beans. It didn't take long, Linda says to Sam, ludicrous.

In the Mutt's Nuts, Dappy is glad they got Jim to eat. Linda in the house wonders if the huskies are actually in luxury and just making them feel bad. The huskies wonder if Jim comes across as funny and entertaining and Linda is just mean and complaining. Ollie brings out a tray of chocolate cherry brandy but Jim doesn't want any. Jim opens up to Liz about his wife, his legal problems and his defense proved his innocence but he lost so much professionally. He had nothing to do with underage sex but got caught up in it anyway. The huskies watching from the Mutt's Nuts don't think Linda is buying Jim's story.

It's 11pm and the housemates think they're safe for the night when a distressed seal signals danger. The huskies have to quickly get dressed in the Mutt's Nuts and exit the Kennel. The explorers wait for them in the garden. Ollie runs to tie them up. As the huskies cuddle in fear, they ask the polar explorers if they got alcohol and Ollie says no. Jim says they they did get cherry brandy but didn't drink it. Linda says she did, and they had wine too. The huskies are upset Ollie lied and Linda blames it all on Jim for bringing it up. Jim says he never said she had any. Jim walks off and Linda says she's not going to let Jim make her look bad. Jim returns with the undrunk cherry brandy and dumps it in the snow.

Back in the Mutt's Nuts, Casey is enjoying her champagne as the listen to the video stream from the house. In the DR, Jim tells BB it's hard to not be negative when you're so tired. He's board and he thinks the treatment of the huskies has been unfair. Quoting Captain Kirk, Jim says the house feels empty with the children gone. In the Mutt's Nuts, Luisa plays a game of Would You Rather. They all agree that Sam has been playing it safe in the house. Back in the house, the quiet in the living room is deafening. Ollie breaks the ice, saying Spin the Bottle? In the Mutt's Nuts, Lee lays down next to Casey who asks him if he wants a blow job? They giggle. Lee calls it a doggy treat.

In the DR, Linda says Jim tried to make an argument between her and the huskies but Dappy is the only one in the house falling for it. She says there is no chance for a reconciliation between her and Jim. There's a better chance of her flying to the moon.

Coming Up...

Will Jim and Linda's time in the house together run out with Wednesday's live eviction, or will the British public punish Linda by sending either Sam or Liz home instead? Will Liz's loyal readers keep her safe yet again? Will Sam summon the support to keep her in the house? Who do you want to be evicted? If you haven't been watching, check out our coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk to see what has everyone in Great Britain talking!

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Day Nineteen - Frosty The Showman

Jim, Liz and Sam are skating on thin ice on the Eviction rink. Who will go? Great Britain will decide!

The shopping task continues with the housemates being worked like dogs. Fresh snow has fallen in the garden and the Explorers have been living in the house, and the Huskies in the Kennel which the Explorers don't know, is really the comfortable Mutt's Nuts pub with a video screen into the main house. The actual food task is keeping the Mutt's Nuts a secret. The Polar Explorers are woken by the noise of a distressed seal, an alert to go collect their Huskies from the Kennel and tie them up for their own protection. The Huskies whine pitifully, making it sound like they are living in horrendous conditions. I got sick twice yesterday, Dappy the dog says.

The next challenge gives the Explorers the chance to win a good meal for their Huskies and after Ollie, Liz and Jim back out, Linda agrees to go. The Huskies, who are already enjoying a full English breakfast in the Mutt's Nuts, are watching on the screen as Linda has to eat a bowl of dog food. Husky Lee says it's not so bad, he's had dog biscuits before. It's pure gold, Lee says, they're making her do it for nothing. They urge her on the screen to stop when she begins gagging. Why didn't Ollie step up, Dappy asks, she just redeemed herself in a huge way.

Ollie and Sam talk children and she wants a big family, Ollie just one child. In the Mutt's Nuts, the Huskies discuss the chances of Sam and Ollie getting together. He fancies her but she sees him only as a friend. BB calls the Huskies on the Dog Bone Phone and gives them the opportunity to ask some questions of the nominees, Jim, Sam and Liz. But the nominees will think the questions came from viewers. Jim is asked who would he rather make love to, Liz or Linda? He says neither since he's married, he'd rather shoot himself. Liz would rather snog Ollie, marry Lee and avoid Jim. Sam genuinely does like Ollie but it's just a friendship. With flirting. Dappy is Jim's favorite housemate, Liz would leave Jim behind in a burning building, and Sam thinks Dappy and Luisa would be the best in bed. Jim finds Luisa unattractive, vulgar and obvious.

Lee clarifies that he's not "with" Jasmine and though he said he was going to get a flat after the show, he never said she would move in with her. Luisa asks if Jasmine's been dumped. No, Lee says, I want a relationship but I don't want a girlfriend right now. Now Casey is upset because Lee says he didn't ask Jasmine to move in with him and has Lee and Luisa going before they realize she was pranking them.

That afternoon, the housemates reach the North Pole and must now rescue their shopping. They have 1 minute to break out their shopping from blocks of ice with heavy hammers. They free all their shopping and BB gathers the housemates to the living room to reveal the results of the real shopping task. BB reveals that what the Explorers thought was the Shopping Task wasn't really the real task. BB rolls video of the Huskies in the Mutt's Nuts and the nominees responses to the Huskies' questions. Casey defensively says it wasn't luxury. BB then tells the housemates that the real task was for the Huskies to keep their life of luxury secret from the Explorers and since they were successful, they have passed the Shopping Task and will receive a luxury budget.

Casey and Sam talk in the living room about Linda being upset about Jim. Casey warns Sam to stay away from it, it has nothing to do with them or the game. BB summons Luisa and Dappy to the DR. BB says the discussion of nominations is not permitted but Dappy talked about it the previous night and Luisa earlier today. As punishment, they must wear a twinsy - a two-person body suit, and clean the bathroom. Dappy says Luisa keeps reaching behind him and touching his balls. They come downstairs but won't say why they are being punished. The start in the bathtub and find sharing the same one-piece clothes makes it difficult to move around.

Lee tries to score points by talking about how dolphins have information about life humans don't know and some people are trying to understand their language. He thinks spiritual enlightenment is a method of control. Dappy animatedly entertains himself in the bedroom. Lee talks about when he was 17 and on 9/11 said F*ck New York, what about the nearly extinct animals around the world? He says he was too young to understand why the way he said it was offensive and all he meant was he was tired of the coverage from America ignoring other problems in the world. Ollie tells Sam he doesn't want her to go tomorrow even if she doesn't fancy him. She says she meant inside the BB House, leaving open the possibility of outside the house. Ollie says that's not what you said, you completely dismissed me.

In the DR, Jim talks about his favorite subject, Linda, and says he is not going to give up trying to be nice to her and he's not going to give up in the house. But he hopes he's out tomorrow, it's been enough. But if he's voted to stay in, he's going to do his darndest to win for them. Out in the garden, the snow is gone and Sam continues to try to make Ollie feel better but Ollie's seriousness about their relationship confuses her. Luisa doesn't want Liz to go. Liz only brought one dress because her agent said she'd be out after 4 days, she keeps washing her 3 pairs of knickers. Lee finds this hilarious.

In the bedroom, Sam tries on Ollie's pink pig jumper after Ollie told her she couldn't have it. Dappy says he wears his heart on his sleeve and you're playing games with him. Sam calls Dappy annoying and brushes him off. Luisa asks Lee why he sleeps in the same bed with Casey. Because she asks for it and he just wants to go to sleep. Luisa says Casey describes Lee as a friend with benefits. Lee says I have no interest in getting in another thing. Once we're out of the house, it's my business, I can talk to Jasmine and explain things, I don't want to hurt Casey, I'm backing off from her, I don't want to upset her, I don't need to look bad in here. But last night she said I can't wait to F*** you when we get out of this place. Lisa says you should have told her it's never going to happen.

Linda talks with Luisa about how Casey is playing a game. That's what Lee's been saying, Luisa says. Ollie tells BB he wants Sam to be there on the last day but they're just mates having a lovely time, but when you like someone, you like someone. But I don't want to put moves on her like Lee or Dappy, she's my rock in the house. Lee and Casey bed down for the night for a spoon and Luisa whispers to Sam and Linda that Lee had just said he wouldn't do that. Spoon with me, Casey whispers. It's too hot, Lee replies.

Voting is now closed and it's time to say goodbye to one of the three nominated celebrities. The results are in, it's time to talk to the house. Jim, Liz and Sam, the viewers have spoken, your fate is sealed. The celebrity housemate with the fewest votes to save and fourth to be evicted is...


I'm out, Liz says excitedly! Liz makes her goodbyes and ascends the stairs to the front door. Puppies, her former housemates call to her. She is treated to boos as she descends the outdoor stage to meet the paparazzi and her fans. In her eviction interview, Liz reveals that she wears a hearing aid and sometimes her distance from the other housemates was her not being able to follow conversations. She describes the CBB experience like being in therapy for 3 weeks. Did it help? A little bit, maybe, she's going to try to enjoy her life instead of just endure it.

Coming Up...

After 3 evictions, house cat Liz has lost all of her lives. The finale is one week from tonight, and that means only one more eviction on Friday: face-to-Face nominations are on tap tonight! Check out our coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk for the latest news from the Celebrity Big Brother UK House!

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Day Twenty - Celebrity Carnivores

Day 20, it's eviction day and it's raining. Lee asks Ollie if being rejected by Sam the previous night was awkward. He says it bummed him out hard. Dappy and Lee say Sam isn't going to let her guard down. Jim is cutting up fruit for breakfast with Linda saying absolutely nothing.

For the past 20 days, Sam and Ollie have sat on the fence and avoided confrontation but for today's task, BB is making them literally sit on a fence and take sides in the house's disputes. In Casey vs. Lee, Sam takes Casey's side and Ollie does too. They both feel Lee benefits more from the relationship, though Ollie protests having been put in the situation. The next question is who is more sexist, Dappy or Jim. Both select Jim but Ollie cannot remember a situation where Jim was sexist, he ignores things like that. BB won't let the housemates provide him with reasons.

Now it gets personal - does Ollie stand a chance with Sam? Both Ollie and Sam say yes. Ollie says you have to be optimistic. Sam says he's gorgeous and we have fun, so why say no? Awkward, Linda says. Ollie and Sam split on who starts the arguments between Jim and Linda, with Ollie saying Linda then changing his mind and joining Sam in blaming Jim. Lastly, Sam and Ollie came down on Luisa's side for not believing women would vote for Jim. Jim says Luisa thinks there's something wrong with women who vote for him. Luisa says don't put words in my mouth. Jim says I don't want to put anything in your mouth.

Sam and Ollie get a picnic in the tree house loft for completing their fence task and getting their opinions off their chests. Ollie says he's spent 2 weeks with her without makeup and he still wants to be with her every day. Casey worries Lee is upset after being put on the spit in the task. Lee tells BB that whenever he thinks they are OK as friends, she goes to another level and he looks bad for being insensitive. He never said they were friends with benefits, it doesn't benefit him, it makes him look bad.

After Liz's eviction, the housemates are informed that nominations tonight will be face-to-face. Linda nominates Jim because she can't get over him brining up her diseased husband., and Ollie for not having a pair of balls. Dappy nominates Luisa for calling him sexist, and Linda because Linda for accusing him of sleeping throughout the day and he needs his rest. Ollie nominates Jim for initiating arguments and he hates arguments, and Lee for the whole Casey/Jasmine situation. Jim nominates Luisa because he doesn't like her, she's a sh*t stirrer, and Linda because she came into the house being angry at him no matter what he does to try to be nice to her.

Casey nominates Jim for being intolerant of the housemates who don't want to go to bed early, and Dappy for not eating food when other people can't. Sam nominates Jim for starting arguments and the way he nominated her previously, and Lee for isolating himself after Jasmine left. Lee nominates Sam for wanting to switch places with him on the block, and Ollie for not taking his side in the Fence task after he had confided in him. Luisa tries to change her nomination, and Dappy wants to change his too. BB says you cannot change nominations, and as punishment, Luisa's power to nomination has been rescinded.

The housemates nominated for eviction are Jim, Ollie, Luisa, Linda and Lee. Casey, Sam and Dappy are safe.

Luisa says she knew BB would do that. Dappy is visibly upset with nominations. Luisa tells Casey, Dam and Linda that she swapped Ollie for Dappy and that's why they wouldn't let her nominate. Dappy says he put Linda up for nothing because Luisa's nomination was invalidated. Linda says sorry doesn't cut it, you should have nominated for a reason. She says Jim lied saying he never brought up Linda's husband (what he meant was Linda brought him up first before they came into the house). Lee tells Casey that Dappy's upset she nominated him but he'll be in the Final 5. Casey tells Dappy it's just the game. How come no one feels distraught putting me up, Jim jokes.

Casey and Sam say Jim and Linda need to stay out of each other's way. In the kitchen, Linda asks Jim to stop being nice to her, she accuses him of being two-faced for cooking dinner and offering her a knife. Jim says accept dinner with gratitude. Stop pretending you like me, Linda says. That won't be hard, Jim says. Jim and Lee count the nominees and figure on a double eviction Friday. Ollie tells everyone he hates confrontation but after tonight's nominations, he wondered why he was smiling. He explains he nominated Lee because he was sharing a bed with Casey and he wasn't going to be two-faced with her, taking Lee's side and her side at the same time. He tells Linda that he has not been in an argument with anyone because he's stayed out of everyone else's arguments. He doesn't see anything wrong with that, he's stayed friends with everyone by doing the right thing.

I'm going to be sick, Linda whispers to Luisa. Linda says he hasn't avoided confrontation, he's just not had an opinion. Sam tells Ollie he stuck up for himself. Well said, Dappy tells him. Luisa tells Linda that Ollie is desperate to win, he was like the Prime Minister addressing his cabinet. He has some balls, she says, sitting us on the sofa like that, and telling us he is fabulous and great. It's all about me, Luisa dances. Out in the garden, Ollie can hear her singing and says that's not fair. Casey explains to Jim what Luisa was saying. Ollie goes into the bedroom where Luisa and Linda tell him he was self-indulgent. Ollie says I was just trying to stick up for myself and say how I felt. And you're singing and dancing and mocking me, that's not fair.

Luisa presses on, why does she have to listen to him defend himself. Ollie apologizes for standing up and won't do it again. He returns to the garden and says now I've had an argument. With Luisa, Jim asks? Surely not! Ollie is very upset as Jim congratulates him on his first argument. Casey assures him the public will understand what he meant to do. She does spin sh*t around, doesn't she, Ollie says. I told you, Jim says. Linda and Luisa are smiling and laughing in the bedroom.

Coming Up...

The housemates suspect a double eviction Friday, but with the finally less than a week away, could this be triple the carnage? Will Jim succeed in not trying to be nice, or is Linda laughing up making Jim look like the bad guy? Is Casey a master player? What is Dappy really upset about? And is there anything, or anyone Luisa cannot spin in her favor? Whose celebrity projection will the British public see through with Friday's eviction? Check back here nightly for the answer to these questions and more Celebrity Big Brother UK action!

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Day Twenty-One - Making Up Is Hard To Do (So Why Bother?)

They've lasted 22 days in the Celebrity Big Brother house, but one of these housemates isn't going to last any longer. Jim, Lee, Linda, Luisa, Ollie. Who leaves the party early? We'll find out live tonight on the final live eviction! Or is it?

It's a fresh new day for old arguments as we return to yesterday. Over breakfast, Linda says she really means it when she says she's sorry for last night, it just seemed a bit dramatic. Ollie says he didn't mean for it to be like that. Luisa goes to the DR to complain to BB about her fellow housemates having delusions of grandeur, especially Ollie for calling the house meeting to explain his nominations. Dappy asks Linda to end the awkward silence between them and she hugs him and he apologizes. Like a switch, Dappy is happy again.

Lee and Jim talk about the final week in the house - it's only 5 sleeps left. Lee thinks Jim will beat Linda but Luisa will go Friday and him. They agree Linda and Luisa have been the stems about everything. In the DR, Ollie says Luisa enjoys arguments, has argued with everyone in the house and didn't deserve him giving her the benefit of the doubt. At the same time, Luisa tells Sam and Linda that Ollie is playing to the cameras and she isn't going to walk on eggshells and worry about what she says. Is that what she's been doing? Luisa notes Dappy hasn't said anything to Luisa. She doesn't understand why people care so much what others think of them.

Dappy is the next in the DR to dump on Luisa, saying she won't talk to him now. He's not a sexist - women make the world go round, he's a mamma's boy. Dappy also says Luisa has argued with everyone in the house. In the bedroom, Luisa tells Lee and Linda she's upset that Dappy's upset, they were fine before but now he won't speak to her and it makes him look bad. In the living room, Ollie tells Jim and Dappy he's not going to talk to Luisa, it's her problem not his. Jim says apologizing to certain people gets you nowhere. Ollie says she was vile last night and wasn't even drunk, she just needs to make others feel bad to make herself happy.

Dappy and Lee compare fan base size on Twitter and using YouTube and Instagram to create buzz. Ollie heads into the bedroom and Casey encourages Luisa to make peace with him. Luisa gets up to say sorry and Lee slips onto the bed next to Casey. Luisa says she has a dry sick sense of humor and didn't mean to upset him and she's learning she can't treat her housemates like her friends. She doesn't dislike him and was impressed with his confrontation with him, that's why she didn't argue back. You can't help who you are and shouldn't change. I won't, Ollie says.

Lee debuts a new act for life after CBB - thumb puppets from behind the couch. Linda asks the thumbs to tell a joke and the left thumb makes Linda and Casey laugh. Ollie hasn't let go yet and tells Dappy that no one has made him feel like Luisa did in a long time. Dappy says you did it right.

Thursday's task puts the housemates on the campaign trail to save themselves from eviction, giving teach nominated housemate the chance to present their case on why they should stay in the Celebrity Big Brother House and smear one of their rivals. Jim goes first, with the campaign slogan A Good Bloke, Plain & Simple. He wastes no time going after Luisa with a few digs at Linda as well. Next is Lee who focuses on his appearance and favorable characteristics. And last but not least, he sang with Elton John. With great British drama, he places Luisa in his crosshairs. Linda circles her photo placard with glorifying terms and says she thinks she's been a good housemate and certainly a grateful one. On the other hand, Jim is a good bloke in his own mind but in reality he's two-faced, a tactical voter, and kissed Evander's arse so closely his nose was brown.

Luisa says she's honest and has had the displeasure of meeting some awful people in the house and is campaigning against Lee, the horniest housemate. She issues a warning against all women in the house and outside. Ollie is against arguing and has never started an argument and doesn't want to miss a moment. He apologizes for not doing more to stand up for himself. But this is more difficult because this is confrontational, the argument last night. I stood up for myself in some way and was ridiculed for it, so I'm campaigning against Luisa.

After the campaigns, Jim, Dappy and Lee talk about how nervous Ollie is at speaking before the group. But they agree it was a good speech. Dappy and Lee think Luisa will be gone, but Jim thinks it will be him. Ollie apologizes to Luisa for his campaign against her and she asks how long will he be one of life's victims? He says he wasn't a victim. Luisa jumps back in with both feet saying she's not picking on him but just expressing an opinion. Sam says you can have an opinion and keep it to yourself sometimes. Linda tells Ollie to be the man you want to be, I was trying to tell you your opinion is important and you should express it.

The vote lines are frozen as we save a couple housemates from eviction. It's time to talk to the house. Jim (cheers), Lee (boos) , Linda (boos), Luisa (mixed), Ollie (cheers), the viewers have spoken, your fate has been sealed. The two housemates with the most votes to save, in no particular order are...

Ollie, you are safe!

The second person safe from eviction is...


Ollie and Jim are both safe. Lee, Linda and Luisa, one of you will be evicted tonight. Voting lines are now reopened.

It's back to some titillating pillow talk in the CBB House and Casey asks Lee do you prefer big or little boobs? Lee just slaps his face. Casey thinks Dappy wouldn't get that excited about fake boobs. Lee disagrees, guys just like something they can grip. Luisa and Casey decide they are dealing with the men in the house with class and dignity. Luisa says she's always had Ollie's back. Casey says her problem is she's too open. Luisa says so is Lee, that's why you would make a good couple. Luisa jokes that Lee wants to chase the American Dream (Jasmine). Casey says he wants to have fun and Luisa adds that Jasmine is a good time girl.

Luisa deep throats a banana while Lee and Casey discuss celebrity earnings. Casey jokes that she deserves a bonus. Lee says he'll give her a bonus. Casey retorts he's got to pay for it. Dappy walks up to Luisa and kisses her on the cheek. Bastard, she tells him. Sexism is a big thing for me, Dappy says. Luisa apologizes. The damage is done, Dappy says, it got transmitted all over, next to Jim. Luisa tells him he shouldn't hang out with Jim. Jim is snoring in the bedroom, finally getting some sleep. The rest of the house turns in early as well, leaving just Casey and Lee awake. Just 3 more days, Lee tells her, then it's OK. She turns the lights off then climbs on top of him in bed. They cuddle and Casey says she can't stay. Get off then, Lee says and Casey returns to her bed.

Voting is now closed, which means it's almost eviction time. Lee, Linda, Louisa, tonight the long journey to the final will be cut short for one of them. It's time to talk to the house. Lee, Linda and Luisa, the viewers have spoken, your fate is sealed. For the last 48 hours, the British public has been voting to save. The housemate with the fewest number of votes and therefore evicted is...


Linda, you have lost your place in the Celebrity Big Brother House! Be fabulous, Linda tells her former housemates on the way out.

We're now down to the Magnificent 7 but its time to deliver some big news to the housemates. Lee, Louisa, Casey, Dappy, Jim, Ollie and Sam. You have all made it to the Celebrity Big Brother Final! Congratulations and have a great evening!

The housemates jump up for joy, Ollie, Dappy and Lee in a big bro hug. But do you wanna know a secret? Emma says, I told a bit of a porcupie. There's going to be a top secret eviction on Sunday and the celebrity with the fewest votes will be leaving the house for good. We're cruel, aren't we!

The phone lines are now open for the British voting public to vote for their favourite housemate to WIN!

Coming Up...

With Linda gone, it should go without saying that Jim is a happy celebrity (but we'll say it anyway), so will life in the house be all tea and crumpets, or will another housemate draw his ire? Will the belief that they will all be in a 7-housemate finale change the way the housemates behave with each other, or the bickering continue? Sunday night's highlight show will feature a surprise live eviction, so don't go anywhere! And check out our coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk for the latest news from the Celebrity Big Brother UK House!

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Day Twenty-Two - Happy Endings

It's Day 22 in the Celebrity Big Brother house and tonight one of the housemates will be evicted. Jim is the first up and finds something unusual in the living room, a huge, oversized camera. Word of the camera quickly spreads and the housemates gather in the living room to learn that they will be taking Celebrity Selfies, called at any moment by BB with only 10 seconds to pose. First the whole house takes a picture. Later, Ollie is instructed to take a picture with the housemate he likes least and picks Sam. Jim is told to pucker up with the housemate he feels is the fakest. Luisa comes running, protesting she's real. Jim says I know you're not real because you say you want people to tell you what they think to your face but I did it and you hate me. I don't hate you, she says. We love to love, Jim says. We love to hate, Luisa says.

There's more selfies featuring awkward combinations prompted by Big Brother. Dappy and Jim talk out in the garden. A big night, Dappy says. I've a bad feeling I'm staying tonight, Jim says. Casey and Lee are cuddling in the bedroom while Ollie gives Sam a massage and talks about women farting. Dappy comes into the bedroom and Lee tries to get out of bed but Casey pulls him back in. He gets out again and puts on his pants, falling onto the floor. Stand up, Dappy says, let's see how big your willy is? What did you do, he asks Casey, to give him a woody?

BB assigns Jim a task to set up shop in the tree house loft and one by one, talk to his fellow housemates to find out what's bothering them. Casey is the first to meet with Dr. Jim and says she's really happy now, we've become really good friends (with Lee). Sam offloads to Jim about Ollie, saying we're just flirting without pressure. Linda complains to Big Brother about the task and being forced to speak to Jim about any problems. BB tries to get her to go to Jim and tell her she doesn't want to take part in the task. Are you mad, Linda asks?

Luisa is next to share her thoughts with Jim, saying she's always hated and doesn't give a sh*t. Would you care if the audience boos you? No. Would you take pleasure in the audience booing him? No. So you care about me but not about yourself, Jim probes? Luisa says she doesn't need to make friends, I'm not a people pleaser. She takes pride in being a contradiction. Jim says she's a woman and jokes he'll leave her with that sexist remark. Jim speaks to Lee next, saying he's a single bloke and he thinks Casey is pleased he made out with her. Jim says he thinks she's in love with Lee. Lee says that makes him confused because he really likes Jasmine and he looks stupid. I wear my heart on my sleeve, you know, Lee says. Good thing you have 2 sleeves, Jim jokes.

After completing his interviews sans Linda, Jim delivers his state of the house report, that the house will all feel better if there are no more arguments, and then says he needs to see a shrink himself now after listening to all their problems.

The housemates are dressed for the live eviction and Luisa gives a nervous Linda a pep talk, you've only been nominated once because we like you. It's no big deal, if you go, you just have fun leaving. Four minutes later, Linda has to put Luisa's advice into practice as she is evicted from the Celebrity Big Brother House. She says goodbye to all her housemates except Jim. Be a star, Linda, Jim calls out. Mamma Lin they cheer as she steps out the front door to boos.

BB calls the housemates back to the living room and they fear a double eviction. But they are told instead they have all made it to the final! The boys celebrate but Luisa cries because it's another 5 days before she can see her daughter. Luisa, Jim says, just when you think you are leaving... They drag you back in, all the other housemates answer!

Dappy asks how Jim feels now that Linda is gone? She wanted to stay, so I'm sad she's gone Jim says. But I didn't know Linda very well and we started off in a position that couldn't be retrieved. I tried my best and then gave up. Casey, Sam and Ollie call themselves the Three Musketeers in the garden as the rain comes down. They think Jim is going to win. Luisa tells BB that Linda protected her from Jim and without her she's given up hating him. Dappy is in the bedroom in his briefs and can't find his trousers when Luisa comes in and says she can't believe how big his willy is for such a petite man. I'm good at sexing, babe, Dappy jokes.

Jim in the DR says and then there was one. One older person. They're all very pleased but chaffed I'm here. I'm chaffed I'm here. Dappy is laying on his back in bed feeling ill and Jim turns him over and brings him a glass of water. Casey asks Lee in the garden if he'll get together with Jasmine after this and Lee says no, not after this. It was all so crazy. Why did you do that to me, she asks? It killed me when I saw you holding hands, I cried, I couldn't help it. I'm sorry for that, Lee says, I haven't met anyone I got along with so easily as you, but with Jasmine we liked all the same things. But it's too much water under the bridge.

In the kitchen, Ollie says to Sam Lee must realize this is why he's getting boos. He thinks he should offer Lee his double bed in exchange for Lee's single. Lee comes inside but Ollie doesn't say anything. Luisa and Jim settle old scores in the kitchen, Luisa saying that she's never met a man so aggressive and rude as Jim. She explains that the things she says meant to be sarcastic when she called him an old miserable git, and she was taken when he nominated her saying she was the most horrible woman in the world. Jim says being called a miserable old git made him feel unwanted and out of place in the house. Luisa says I didn't mean to make you feel that way, I do care about how I make other people feel. There you go, Jim pounces, the ice maiden melteth!

Sam and Casey head into the toilet and turn the water faucet on so they can begin snogging in private, but their lip smacking can be heard. The water turns off and Lee says stop it, you're killing me, you can't do that. They come out of the toilet laughing. The housemates are bedding down and Lee and Casey are bedding together. Casey says her hands are above the duvet. Oh just give him some, Jim says. Lee, you're very naughty, Luisa jokes. Ollie says any fingering that might happen will happen with the lights off. He turns the lights off and Jim makes snogging sounds with his cheeks but gets no reaction. But there's a lot of movement under the duvet.

Coming Up...

The housemates were told they had all made it to next Wednesday's finale, but the great British public has been voting for their favorite housemate to win and on Sunday, the housemate with the least votes to win will have a surprise eviction live during the highlight show. One of the celebrity housemates will have their dreams of glory crushed with the finish line in sight. Who do you think it will be?

Check out our coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk for the latest news from the Celebrity Big Brother UK House!

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Day Twenty-Three - Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word

The crowds have gathered in the interview box outside and out of earshot of the Celebrity Big Brother house for a special Sunday Night eviction but did anyone remember to invite the housemates? The British public has been voting to win and the housemate with the least votes will be evicted. And that party invitation will be rescinded personally in the house. It's a surprise party and for one housemate, the party is about to be over.

Day 23 and the housemates woke up Saturday morning, believing all seven had made it to Wednesday's season finale and were safe. Casey wakes up in Lee's arms, Dappy jumps on Ollie and Jim heads to the toilet. Luisa jokes Lee can't get up because he's got a giant penile erection. In the bathroom, Luisa asks Lee if Jasmine is dumped. Lee says it's a difficult situation but he hasn't promised either Casey or Jasmine anything.

There's a large grandfather clock against the wall in the living room with the power to stop time. When the clock chimes, housemates must freeze whatever they are doing until it chimes again. Luisa doesn't think they would send in her best friend. Dappy says anything could happen. The clock chimes and the housemates freeze, then Lee's bandmates from Blue come in singing One Love Is All You Need. They hold the microphone up to Lee's mouth for his vocal and he struggles to maintain his composure. Luisa gets a kiss, as does Dappy from the gay member of the band. See ya later, Leroy, they say before exiting. Lee falls to the floor and his housemates fall on top of him laughing.

Casey worries what the boys in the band think of her. Ollie thinks it's a weird discussion. Lee wonders if they were trying to send him a message or just having fun with him. Luisa tells him he could be unintentionally leading Casey on. Lee doesn't think Jasmine will even want him when they get out of here. Casey tells Lee she was really intimidated by the boys in Blue. The clock chimes and the housemates freeze. Sam's mother comes into the house and goes straight to her for a big hug and kiss. Ollie is crying in place as mom tells Sam how amazing she's been and how proud they are of her. How about Ollie then, she says, he's gorgeous! I want to curl you up and take you home with me, I love you loads! She goes over to Ollie and rolls his shoulders, saying you're such a gentleman and everyone outside loves you too!

Ollie and Sam hug as everyone tells Sam how gorgeous her mom looks. A little while later, Oliver's mother, sister and dog find him in the backyard. Ollie breaks down crying again as the dog shows his master how much he misses him, licking him non-stop all over the face. Nice to meet you, Dappy, the sister says to a frozen Dappy. Keep it up, Ols, they tell him as they head back into the house and through the clock. Dappy jumps up to give a sobbing Ollie a hug.

Casey is grooming Lee, whose head is on Casey's lap. The clock chimes again and former housemate Jasmine comes in. I'm back, she says and Ollie has a look of horror on his face. Lee is quickly sits up and moves away from Casey. Jasmine sits down next to Casey, telling her that Lee told he really really like her and only liked Casey as a friend, and as soon as she left, Casey threw herself at him. Ollie and Sam share uncomfortable frozen grins. It's kind of embarrassing, Jasmine says, because you intentionally and deliberately went out to hurt me. Lee's face is ashen. Jim has moved to the bedroom door so he can listen in.

I've had to sit at home, Jasmine continues, and watch this every day as you throw it in my face. Casey keeps her face frozen as Jasmine says I've seen everything, I've seen you put your t*ts on his face and saying how horny you are, please cuddle me and I can't wait to have sex when we get out of here (Lee is now grimacing in pain), just a lot of intentionally, hurtful things. Jasmine gets up and goes over to Lee. And you, she says to him, are you aware of all the things you said to me? You know what you said, the whole world knows what you said. Breaking silence, Lee responds we're friends. Who, Jasmine asks? Me and Casey. That's why you're in the bathroom last night, Jasmine pounces, making out with her? No I wasn't, Lee denies. I just watched it on TV, Jasmine says. We've been affectionate as friends, Lee tries to explain, nothing else.

Jim sticks his head through the bedroom door to see what's happening. Maybe there's been some harmless flirting, Lee allows. It's so hurtful, Jasmine says, because she has feelings... Tell me what I said, Lee asks, tell me what I said? You're hurting her, Jasmine accuses, you're hurting me, it's not fair! Casey continues to be stone faced as Lee says he knows what he's done, and promises Jasmine they've not done anything. Jim is standing in the doorway watching. We're friends, Lee repeats. This might be a game to you..., Jasmine says This isn't a game to me, Lee counters. Casey has true feelings for you and you lead her on to believe that. Lead her on, Lee cries, turning to face Casey, do I lead you on? Casey stays frozen. I don't lead anyone on, Lee says, turning back to face Jasmine. I think you do, she says.

Lee turns to Dappy, Ollie, Sam and Dappy and apologizes, saying he just can't sit here and take it. Jasmine jumps up and screams Hi, Dappy, giving him a big hug and kiss. I love you guys and miss you, LuLu (Luisa), Jasmine says, I adore you all, even you, Case. I'm not upset, she says, it's just hurtful that the minute I left... It's not what you think it is, a defeated Lee says. It didn't happen like that, Casey finally says, we didn't speak for 2 days. I saw you ask him do you want a blow job, Jasmine accuses Casey, and Lee says yeah, we'll call it a puppy treat. Sam is having trouble not laughing. Lee says I said maybe we'll call it a puppy treat. It's a lot of banter. I gotta go, Jasmine cuts him off, I love you all, bye. She gives Lee a kiss on the lips and Casey a peck on the cheeks. Adios, Amigos and she walks back through the clock.

The clock chimes and Lee gets up and goes to the bedroom, Casey straight to the toilet. No one else says anything except Jim who walks into the living room and asks, anything good? What happened? Luisa tells him Jasmine came in. Jim says he heard the shouting and stuck his head in but doesn't think he broke the law. Lee is in the bedroom, head in his hands. Oah, he moans.

The vote lines are now frozen and the final visitor in the Frozen Time task will be Emma, revealing the surprise eviction. And when the clock chimes again and the housemates can move, the housemate with the fewest votes to win will have left with her.

But first, after Jasmine's return, Lee tells Dappy, Jim and Ollie seeing Jasmine kills him, he laughs and jokes and flirts with Casey but to be honest, I wanted back Jasmine outside here. It's none of our business, Jim asks, is it? In the toilet, Casey is crying to Sam and Luisa. I don't care about that whole Lee and Jasmine thing, I just feel awful for my parents, that's what I'm bothered about. You're parents know you're on a TV show, Luisa says. Jim knocks on the door and enters the toilet. Lee tells Ollie and Dappy he's not affectionate with Casey the same way he was with Jasmine, the way I looked at her and stroked her face, I don't do that with Casey. It's totally different things, it's all fun and tongue and cheek. Dappy says I know.

Ollie says think about how it looks, like sharing a bed last night. I didn't mean for that, Lee says, and to be honest, all we did was have a cuddle. I'm not leading her on. Casey exits the toilet wearing sunglasses to hide her red eyes. It may look like that to the outside world and it may look like that to Jasmine, but it's not the truth. Casey knows exactly how I feel about it and she understands and is cool with it. In the living room, Casey is drinking a cup of tea. Jim says you've done nothing wrong. It's my mum and dad, Casey sobs. Your mum and dad will believe you even more. They're going to be so embarrassed about this. They won't, Jim says, they're big people. Be proud of what you've done here, Luisa says as Jim gets up to give her a hug. This is for me, not for you, he says. I feel like I've let them down, Casey says. Never, Jim says.

Back in the bedroom, Lee says I'm a single man. I think you think that, Ollie advises, but I don't think she's (Casey) a little bit in love with you, mate. Dappy says she could just be sitting at home saying I'm waiting, I'm waiting, he gave me that look, that means something. Dappy's right, Ollie says. I swear to you, Lee swears, I haven't given her that look deep in her eyes. It's the cuddling, the stroking, that's all she sees, Dappy says. Then we can't be like that, Lee realizes. Exactly, Dappy says, finally getting through. I don't mean to hurt her, Lee says.

Lee finally comes out of the bedroom to ask Casey if she's all right. She cries in his arms, saying she doesn't give a sh*t about the whole you and I thing, I'm embarrassed for my parents, mortified for my family. You shouldn't be, Lee says, that's why I had to speak, I couldn't sit there and take what she was saying because it wasn't true. They're saying I'm leading you on is bullsh*t, it's flirting in a harmless way and you ain't done anything wrong. I don't see me being disrespectful to anyone, we haven't been snogging each other's faces off, we haven't been vulgar to each other in a certain way, and that is the Gd's honest truth.

Dappy, Ollie, Luisa and Sam are sitting around the dining table. He never thought about how it looks, Sam says, it's his own fault. He's a grown man and... In the tree house loft, Jim asks Casey why she's listening to anything this woman (Jasmine) said? You've been acting classy, you haven't been nominated and everyone loves you. But she's saying, Casey weeps... F*ck her, Jim responds, you are you. Be proud of you, and trust me, there is no way your parents aren't going to be proud of you, otherwise there's no way you would have gotten those nobs out in the Daily Star in the first place. Casey laughs at that and gives Jim a thankful hug. Have a cry, Jim says, but there's nothing to cry about.

In the living room, Luisa tells Lee that Casey is living with a thread of hope and he has to not jump into bed with her, lay with her on the sofa all day. Lee says he's told her there's nothing going on and he does care what Jasmine thinks, more than anything? Then why jump in the bed with Casey? It's harmless, Lee says, and I'm not WITH Jasmine. It's not harmless, Luisa says, you don't realize how bad it makes you look. I do realize, he says. Then don't do it, Luisa says. I know, Lee says, I'm not gonna now. It's 10:28pm and most of the housemates are asleep, Casey sharing a bed with Ollie. Do you think I've done anything wrong, she whispers? Not at all, he assures, they're your emotions. Love you, she says. Love you too, he answers. Thank you for being there for me, she says. Don't be silly, he replies.

Lee is in the DR asking to leave a message for Jasmine. I want to say he never led Casey on and I know there have been things said but I've said from the offset to Casey that we're just friends, I want to be friends the way we was but we're just enjoying each other's company, harmless fun. I don't want you thinking as soon as you left I jumped back on Casey's boat, because I didn't. Maybe you seen some stuff that's been perceived in a certain way but it's not like that. I just want to speak to Jasmine, I want to tell her that everything I said and still feel about her is the same, it's not changed. I like Casey as a friend and that's it, that's all it is and Casey knows that and I know that and I want Jasmine to know Jasmine to know that. I don't really care a f*ck what anyone else says.

BB fades out with the music: What am I going to do, what am I going to do, when sorry seems to be the hardest word - Elton John

It's time to drop the eviction bombshell. Emma is standing inside the grandfather clock, about to enter the house. We are now LIVE in the Celebrity Big Brother House. Jim, Lee, Dappy, Sam, Casey, Ollie and Luisa are sitting in the living room. Jim wonders if they lied about the transmission date and this is the final tonight. Surely not, his fellow housemates say. They might, Jim jokes, and don't call me Shirley! He gets weak laughs. Something's going on, Lee says. The grandfather clock chimes and all conversation stops as the housemates freeze. It's Emma they whisper under their breaths. Oh no, someone says.

Emma gives a sly smile and a mischievous laugh. Look at you all sat here. Looking very relaxed, Dappy. Walking around the room, she says, Jim's looking lovely. Ollie looks beautiful, Sam looks cheeky, Luisa's always looking naughty. Luisa lets out a slight laugh. Lee's looking very nervous, Emma says. Celebrity Big Brother house, this is Emma. The eviction music hits the living room like a sonic boom. Casey, Dappy, Jim, Lee, Luisa, Ollie, Sam, on Friday we told you that you'd all made the Celebrity Big Brother final. That was a lie. All eyes are on Emma as the housemates, suddenly nominees, try to remain frozen.

For the past 48 hours, Emma says, the British public has been voting for their winner. Tonight the housemate with the fewest votes so far will be evicted from the house and will leave with me immediately. The remaining housemates must stay frozen or risk severe consequences. I can now reveal the Celebrity housemate with the fewest votes and sixth to be evicted is...


Lee throws his fist up in the air, and says I knew it. He jumps up and says thank you so much!

Lee, you have lost your place in the Celebrity Big Brother house. You do not have 30 seconds to say goodbye. She takes his hand and leads him through the grandfather clock. Lee blows them a kiss and says thank you guys. He tosses something to Sam. She's so sexy, she's so hot, the housemates say as the clock door closes. The clock chimes and the housemates react. OMG, they say, not about Lee's eviction but about how gorgeous Emma was. Luisa says it's a good thing he left through the clock, he would have hated to have been booed. Casey sits in stunned silence.

Coming Up...

That had to be the most difficult thing I've ever seen on Big Brother. Lee is gone and a huge storyline has gone with him. The voting lines have reopened as Jim, Casey, Luisa, Sam, Dappy and Ollie remain in the Celebrity Big Brother House, facing the season finale on Wednesday. How will the housemates react to the surprise eviction and how will the British public react to their final six housemates as they vote for the winner? What more does BB have in store for the housemates and can he possibly top this? Let me know who you think is going to win this season of Celebrity Big Brother!

Be sure to check out our coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk for the latest news from the Celebrity Big Brother UK House!

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Day Twenty-Four - The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Day 24 and the celebrities wake up in the aftermath of Jasmine's visit to the Celebrity Big Brother house during the Frozen Time shopping task. The task continues today and Dappy and Jim discuss Lee over breakfast. He seeks attention, Jim says, he can't help himself. Casey has an early cry in the DR over her parents being upset with her. She is upset with Jasmine coming in and ruining their last few days in the house. She says she never threw herself at Lee and they will continue to be good friends. Dappy comes out of the shower wearing nothing but a bunched up towel in front of his groin. Lee is the only one there to enjoy his dancing. Ollie talks finances with Luisa and Jim. In the bathroom, it's Lee's turn to towel off in his birthday suit. Did Casey come in looking for a boyfriend or a career, Dappy asks? Her career, Lee answers, that's why I don't get all this talk about her having feelings for him.

The grandfather clock chimes and its Casey's mother who sneaks up behind her daughter's back. She sits down next to Casey who breaks into tears again. I am so proud of you, mom says, you are doing so well, I've missed you to pieces. Your friends and your family are all supporting you all the time, but listen to me carefully, keep away from Lee. Lee is standing on the other side of the living room. He tells you one thing, mom continues, then behind your back he makes up things to tell the rest of the house. And when he's in the DR, he says you won't leave him alone. He's mugged you off, darling. Just keep away, you can do this yourself, you don't need nobody else, darling. I know you can. She turns to face Jim and thanks him for looking after her daughter. I think you're a very nice gentleman, she says, kisses Casey on the lisp and repeats her words of advice. I love you back, Casey says. By guys, mom says and she's gone.

Dappy, Lee and Luisa come over to comfort Casey. I don't think your mum's the biggest fan of me, Lee says. Jim stands off to the side, takes his glasses off and wipes the tears from his eyes, not saying a word. 9 minutes later, Lee and Ollie share a smoke in the rainy garden. Lee tries to think of what he said that Casey's mom was talking about he said in the DR. I'm going to have people hate me proper when I get out here. Well, a few, Ollie allows. Luisa continues to comfort Casey in the living room. Casey says she can't be in here any more. Luisa tells her to ignore the papers and the trolls on Twitter. Lee walks back into the kitchen and asks Casey for a minute and offers his explanation that her mom was referring to the friends and benefits comment. He says he's never gone to the DR and slagged her off and then come downstairs and pretended otherwise. Casey worries that everyone is going to relive it when they get out. Only for a short while, Lee assures her.

In the kitchen, Casey fills Jim in what her mom said about Lee and Jim believing Jim hadn't heard. Does that mean we can have sex, Jim asks jokingly? Lee tells BB in the DR he's pi$$ed off at being made to look like some love rat player. It takes two to tango and he's never mugged Casey. We cuddle as friends and suddenly I'm a bad guy. I'm single, I'm not married, I'm not even in a relationship. Why am I a wanker looking like a f*cking d*ckhead? In the living room, Casey again thanks Jim for taking care of her. Jim tells Casey it's nice to have a troubled daughter.

The housemates gather in the living area and the grandfather clock chimes. It's Dappys best friend with a gold megaphone and a female entourage wearing sports bras with Dappy's name on it. The bestie takes Dappy in a tight embrace. Jim jokes that Dappy can leave all his daughters here if he likes. Dappy's brother says Lee, Gd save you. Casey and Luisa laugh. Ollie, love you mate. And then he quickly ducks back into the grandfather clock. Dappy falls to the floor as the other housemates rush to his side. He stayed with me, Dappy says, when all my other friends left me.

Lee, Ollie and Dappy play catch the egg but the yolks on Ollie as he drops the egg. It looks like a stork, Dappy says. Luisa, Casey and Sam say 3 more sleeps, girl. Sam jokes that Luisa likes Dappy. Just a little, she admits. The clock chimes, the housemates freeze (sort of) and Luisa's mother comes in with a drawing from Luisa's daughter, Dixie. Luis is in tears as she looks at the drawing. Win the winner, Mommie is the message mom brings from granddaughter. Talking a mile a minute, mom says Jim reminds her of Luisa's father, that's why you're hammer and thongs at each other, he's like Dad! The other housemates manage to keep frozen as mom tells Luisa she's proud of her and loves her, then goes to find Dappy. I've got a message for Dappy, she says. Dappy has a look of fear on his face. Now dangly Dappy, mom says, I want you to keep that in your pants, boy! Dappy and Ollie try to keep a straight face. And Jim, she continues, giving him a peck on the cheek, I love you. Keep entertaining us, she says, walking back through the clock.

The clock chimes and Luisa falls apart looking at the drawing from her daughter left behind. I love you infinity is the message. Who was that, Jim asks? She sounds lovely! Jim talks to the clock which seems to be talking back. Jim thinks it's Rylan. It's only 6pm but Lee has gone to bed. Dappy asks him if he's all right and they fist bump. We've done well to get this far me and you, Dappy says. One more day, Lee says. Dappy says that momma thing got to you, didn't it. Of course it did, Lee says. Don't sleep, Dappy says, I don't want you to sleep the last couple days away. You're a beautiful man inside, he says, and outside. Lee says no matter what I do now, I can't win either way. If I say something, she gets upset, if I don't she gets up set, no matter what I do, I can't win. I hear you, bro, Dappy says.

Dappy and Lee play a game pitching little marbles into a mug when the clock chimes again. Good luck, Jim, the other housemates say since he's the only one not to receive a family or friend in the house yet. It may not be me, Jim says. It's only you left, mate, Ollie says. Jim's wife and daughter come through the clock and he says hello, baby! They give him a hug and a kiss and tell him how much they love him and they brought him some ironed shirts. Jim says he'll give them to Luisa. The daughter heads over to Dappy and thanks him for being so nice to her dad. Jim asks his wife if everything's all right and she says everything's fine. One more hug and the girls wave goodbye to the rest of the house and head back through the clock which chimes to release the the housemates. They compliment him on how gorgeous his wife and daughter are. Jim walks alone into the bedroom and the others give him 5 minutes to compose himself. Right, Jim says, then returns to the living room.

BB has provided the housemates with champagne and canopies in at the dining table when music is piped into the house with the Grammy winning song Get Lucky. Ollie, Luisa and Casey are dancing while Lee buries his head in his arm. Then the clock chimes, Ollie and Casey standing in front of each other in a dance pose, trying not to laugh. The clock chimes again and the music resumes as does the dancing. Lee heads to the toilet to be alone with his thoughts. 7 minutes later, the housemates are called to the living room, speculating why.

Jim wonders if they lied about the transmission date and this is the final tonight. Surely not, his fellow housemates say. They might, Jim jokes, and don't call me Shirley! He gets weak laughs. Something's going on, Lee says. I hope so, Jim says. The grandfather clock chimes and all conversation stops as the housemates freeze. It's Emma they whisper under their breaths as she steps through the clock. Oh no, Jim says.

Celebrity Big Brother house, this is Emma. The eviction music hits the living room like a sonic boom. Casey, Dappy, Jim, Lee, Luisa, Ollie, Sam, on Friday we told you that you'd all made the Celebrity Big Brother final. That was a lie. Oh no, Casey says, wiping the hair out of her eyes. All eyes are on Emma as the housemates, suddenly nominees, try to remain frozen.

For the past 48 hours, Emma says, the British public has been voting for their winner. Tonight the housemate with the fewest votes so far will be evicted from the house and will leave with me immediately. The housemates let out quiet gasps as Emma continues. I can now reveal the Celebrity housemate with the fewest votes and sixth to be evicted is...


Lee throws his fist up in the air, and says I knew it. He jumps up and says thank you so much!

Lee, you have lost your place in the Celebrity Big Brother house. You do not have 30 seconds to say goodbye. Let's go! She takes his hand and leads him through the grandfather clock. Lee blows them a kiss and says thank you guys. He tosses something to Sam. The clock chimes and the housemates react. My heart just started pounding, Dappy says. That's it, Luisa says stunned, Lee's gone! Jim calls Casey over to sit next to him. You all right? Yeah, she says. We wasn't expecting that tonight, was we, Sam says. One minute he's on the sofa, Luisa recaps, the next minute he's F*cked off through the clock! He's just gone! Gone! It's like f*cking Narnia!

Casey and Ollie are talking about Lee in the garden. I can't believe he's gone, Ollie says, how do you feel? Weird, Casey says, because as much as we've had our ups and downs I feel like I've experienced the most with him because we were chained together and everything that's happened since, it feels like that's the end now. In the living room, Jim asks Luisa to explain to him how he's sexist. I don't want to have a fight, Luisa says. I want to know why so I can stop being it, Jim explains, do you understand that? Luisa backpedals and says I instantly liked you when I came in here and you'll watch it back... I won't, Jim declares. Luisa says she used to go to the DR and say how much she liked him and it wasn't true what the papers said, what people said. I don't really know what happened in the second week. Don't you, Jim probes?

Luisa says she laughed at his jokes but the house makes you paranoid. She also admits to saying things to wind people up. Jim says it's good to know I'm not sexist. You let your self down, he continues, by agreeing with you-know-who. I know you couldn't help it, he says, she's a very scary woman (talking about Linda). She was very influential in the house, Luisa admits. That's why she's not here, he says. Maybe, Luisa allows. A little later, Jim touches base with Ollie in the garden and asks him if it's too personal to ask, does he have a bloke partner now? No, Ollie says. I read some stuff in the paper, Jim says. It's all bollox, Ollie says disdainfully. It doesn't bother me one bit, Jim says, I just want you to be happy.

In the bedroom, Luisa is basking on the wonders of sleeping with an eye mask. Dappy is taking off his clothes and says he feels so wild today, he's got to do something crazy. Dappy has a hat covering his front privates and a towel covering his backside. Luisa doesn't see any of this under the eye mask. You what, she asks? I want to do something crazy, she adds, not seeing Dappy dancing through the bedroom to the door. And I'm doing it, Dappy announces, heading out into the garden. What are you doing, a still oblivious Luisa asks? Dappy's naked, Luisa shouts, having taken off her eye mask! He's going in, Jim exclaims! Jim runs over to the hot tub. Just for you, Dappy laughs, just for you! Ollie is on his feet laughing too. With one hand over his rear, the other holding on to the hat in front, he gives Jim a kiss. He dances around to Luisa who has come outside who tries to get out of his way, picking up the towel and trying to wrap it on him. They head back into the bedroom. Just let me look, Luisa jokes, padding his head with the towel instead of letting him wrap it around his midsection.

Ollie and Sam enjoy some pillow talk in the bedroom where Sam asks if Ollie is a whisperer. Ollie replies it makes it more really lovely to do the whatever, you know what I mean? Sam says she's just loud. They talk about scenarios when they would whisper. Sam thinks whispering you are beautiful is romantic. Sam doesn't agree. In the kitchen, Casey tells Luisa she doesn't feel relieved Lee is gone, but sad. Even with what his mom said, she liked him. Even though he almost pied you off? I shouldn't let someone treat me like that, Casey agrees. Luisa says perhaps you're better off. Luisa says Lee kept saying they were just friends and Luisa would ask him if Casey knew that. Casey says a chapter has closed in my life, and that's the end of that. Without a lot of reward, Luisa says. No, Casey sighs.

Coming Up...

I think it's safe to say the housemates have failed their shopping task, though perhaps they never had a chance. Dappy, Jim, Sam, Ollie, Casey and Luisa are your final six and the British public are voting for their winner. Who will take home the Celebrity Big Brother Crown and what last minute obstacles will Big Brother place in their way? Be sure to check out our coverage page at http://mortystv.com/bbuk for the latest news from the Celebrity Big Brother UK House!

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