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BBUK has begun: Live Launch Show


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"Viewers - you have 15 seconds to say goodbye to the summer. Big Brother is coming to get you!"

The titles are strange - very blocky with lots of words flashing by! I'm sure it says something - just need to take time to crack the code! No noticable change to the theme.

Davina and the crowd are outside the house - which has a few minor changes. The doors are now black, with the yellow logo on, and the base of the staircase is a bit walkway for Davina to go up and down on!

Strangely, Davina opens the show with clips of previous series (usually previous series are completly forgotten about!) before screening some highlights from auditions.

Back at the house and Davina is sneaked into the garden and is cosied up to the topery man in "nowhere" - as it's accessed on a bridge to "nowhere". Davina explains the Inside Out concept and guides us round the outdoor lounge, dining room and kitchen - and points out the pool has underwater cameras so if anyone does a Makosi and Anthony, we'll know what happens.

Inside there is grass in the kitchen and a lounge which Davina says is more comfortable than it looks - and it changes colour with the mood. The bedroom has 11 beds, including three double, one of which is a waterbed. The bathroom has a bath, shower, two urinals and a toilet in the bathroom.

The final room to be revealed is the Diary Room - and as usual Davina hasn't seen inside. Outside it's a spiral mixture of mirrors and leather, while inside is a gold leather chair and black padded walls.

Now all we need is some housemates! Each HM walks in one by one, each introduced with a VT mixing audition footage, sultry poses and clips of them seeming to get their kit off!

Bonnie, 20 - willing to get her body out, thinks shes good looking, says she never farts or burps. Annoyingly, the booing has started all ready and she's unfairly booed in - and once in walks around in a stunned silence.

Pete, 24 - a rock and roll singer with Tourettes - and learned to live with it. He's very hyper and a bit of a nutter - considers himself perfect. The crowd love him and he takes forever walking in. Once in, he falls down the stairs before going to meet Bonnie - who asks him what he is taking!

George, 19 - the posh totty. He's related to royalty and is a public school boy. He likes hunting and is friendly with Princess Beatrice (Fergie's daughter). Has a fear of transvestives and hyper gay men. He's booed in to - basically for being posh.

Shahbaz, 37 - a hyper gay men. He's a Scottish gay Paki-muslim - and been unemployed 21 years, describing himself as intelligent but unemployable.

That's the first four - and George is uncomfortable!

After the break it's time to throw in five more!

Lea, 35 - model who has had alot of work done, and isn't afraid to admit it. Used to be fat at 22 stone. Says fat people only have themselves to blame, while ugly people should spend

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The first twist has occured!

Late last night the HMs were asked to select two people to go to the diary room. The many volunteers were whittled down to Lisa and Nikki - but when Nikki backed out, Shahbaz (who is so annoying!) stepped in.

In the diary room Lisa and Shahbaz were told they were the founding members of the "Big Brotherhood" and as such, get a number of privileges.

1: Only members of the Big Brotherhood will receive their luggage

2: Members are immune from the first eviction next week

3: As leaders, they can select new members when BB says who will get their suitcases and also be immune. If they discuss this they will be punished. BB will let them know in due course how many HMs can be selected.

What they don't know though is the other HMs watched the entire conversation on the plasma screens - but they then have to play dumb!

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A quick catch-up, beginning with the Brotherhood. On Friday Pete was chosen as the third member - but as Lisa and Shahbaz's diary room conversation was broadcast, Lisa mentioned the only people she wouldn't pick are Bonnie and Sezer - which didn't go down to well. Bonnie broke down in tears, while Sezer and Shahbaz went to war - more about that later. From this point HMs can discuss the brotherhood.

Next in was Lisa, who chose Grace - while Shahbaz invited Richard into the brotherhood. Last night the five members got an exclusive party, with Lea invited to join the Brotherhood midway through.

All members of the Brotherhood get their suitcases - and more importantly, immunity from the first eviction.

Now, back to Shahbaz - the most annoying HM ever! So annoying that on the first morning in the house Richard found a use for the handcuffs he bought in and used them to lock the sliding doors together while Shahbaz was outside - while yesterday on the live feeds the HMs had resorted to gagging him.

Shahbaz is the main source of tension in the house - his condesending attitude towards tourettes sufferer Pete isn't going down to well with the viewers, while in the house he is at war with Sezer - though all the HMs have issues with him.

Sezer raised the issue of Shahbaz's behaviour after he roughly grabbed an uncomfortable Grace while "method acting", branding him an immature bully. When Shahbaz replied the Sezer "hadn't live", Sezer was quick to point out Shahbaz has been unemployed all his adult life - and he blamed everyone else for his predicament. Shahbaz's reply said it all really - "We're all here to play a part - so play your part well!"

All the HMs are tired of his attitude - but most of them agree that if Shahbaz dropped his front, he's actually a decent bloke underneath.

I just find him annoying and want him out before it turns into the Shahbaz show - but at the moment he has immunity! Hopefully though there will be a twist which results in at least one of the founding members of the Brotherhood being up for eviction!

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